Fanis the Bodyguard Episode 51 Blowing Off Steam

                Fanis is an American living in England.  Like many people around the world, he is irate with the socialist tyranny in the form of lockdowns all over the world.  He especially is upset about it happening in America considering he believes America is the last best hope for the world.  Living with him is his employer Kera.  Kera and Fanis are second cousins and Kera hired him as her bodyguard because as a Chinese artifact dealer, she finds herself in remote areas in places that may not be too friendly to women.  Given the deep pockets of her clients and enemies, she needed someone she knew couldn’t be bought off.  Since Fanis grew up with money, he was the perfect candidate.  In the beginning, people had tried to bribe him but his vitriolic and barbaric response to it sent a wave around the international community not to even try it.  Fanis was pacing around the flat barely able to control his anger.  This excited Kera because a pissed off bodyguard was much more effective at his job because he’d take it out on people who may try to hurt her.  Kera knew that Fanis would never hit her so had no problem egging him on.  She knew why he was upset and she was about to add fuel to the fire, “You know, you were so happy when the DOJ dropped their case against Mike Flynn but you just didn’t anticipate the judge would refuse the motion to dismiss.”

                Fanis turned towards his cousin and barked, “That’s because it doesn’t happen!  If this was a movie, everyone would think it was ridiculous.  In fact, every single movie when the prosecution decides to drop all charges, they don’t even bother to have the judge accept it because it’s implied.”

                “Well, he opened it up to friends of the court to see if anyone else wanted to take over it.”

                “How is that not double jeopardy?”

                “I don’t know, I’m not a lawyer.”

                “You don’t’ have to be to know that this is bullshit.  The DOJ acknowledges that it was an entrapment ploy and the judge wants leftists groups to go take their pound of flesh?  This is a sick human being.”

                “There was a lot of pressure from the media.  Even Barack Obama criticized the DOJ for dropping the case.”

                “That’s exactly why they’re doing it; to destroy Flynn in the court of public opinion by letting his sworn enemies file ‘official’ documents attacking him and lying about him.  It’s mudslinging but this time instead of the media, it’s a fucking federal court.”

                “It’s not just any leftist group; these lawyers that penned the op-ed were the ones who investigated Watergate.”

                “They also wanted Trump to be impeached and look how that turned out.”

                “I’m just saying they’re credible.”

                “You’re not credible because you did something that worked out 45 years ago.  Have you learned nothing the last three years?  What happened to Christopher Steele being credible because he was involved in FIFA?  It actually turned out that his information wasn’t even used for FIFA so even that was a lie but regardless, you don’t get lifetime credibility because you did a good job once.  These 16 jackasses are the ones putting the briefs with the court and they had nothing to do with the fucking case.”

                “Well, if it’s so asinine, then why don’t you have faith in that bulldog lawyer that Flynn has?”

                “Sidney Powell has already filed a motion highlighting that Sullivan is a hypocrite because he rejected 24 previous attempts by parties to intervene in the case.  He is quoted with saying ‘the Federal Rule of Criminal Procedure do not provide for intervention by third parties in criminal cases.  Options exist for private citizens to express his views about matters of public interest, but the court’s docket is not an available option.’  What happened to that?”

                “That’s just for people supporting Flynn not those opposed.”

                “I know you’re joking but the sad part is that’s true.  How could this case get any worse?  You have malicious prosecution by Obama Administration and FBI, Concealment of Brady Material, Coerced guilty plea, ineffectiveness of counsel, independent review by AG/AUSA, prosecution motion to dismiss the case, a judge that accused him of treason and now putting out open season on him for anyone to try to take him out.”

                “I know, it’s a trial court so there’s literally no reason for amici except political.”

                “How does this not piss you off?”

                “I don’t know Flynn and besides I have to prepare for my next meeting.  You should get ready because I think you could use this trip too.”

                “Where are we going?”

                “St. John’s”

                “You miss the beach already huh?”

                “Don’t you?”

                “Yup.”

                “And it doesn’t look like we will be able to go anywhere in the civilized world any time soon.”

                “I’m game.”

                They head to their plane and Fanis notices that there’s no decontamination protocol before they get on like there had been the last couple months.  He queries, “So, what convinced you that this is all an exaggeration and the lockdowns aren’t based in science?”

                “Georgia and Florida opened and the predictions of doom haven’t happened.”

                “Most of the transmissions happened at home too so it seems the lockdowns made it worse.”

                “I was looking at New York’s data and health care workers actually had a lower infection rate than the general population.”

                “It’s all about control.  We were lied to about it being about flattening the curve.  That already happened so they make impossible criteria like testing and tracing.”

                “I just don’t know why though?”

                “Control, power and to hurt Trump.  Blue states will stay locked down to try to stop red states from reviving the economy and opening up.”

                “You’re beginning to make sense.  I get tracing in the beginning but you can’t trace millions of people.  It’s a bit late for that.”

                “They want to create a surveillance state like China.”

                “That’s actually true. The new tracing bill put aside $100 Billion to allow Health and Human Services to come to your house and quarantine a member if you’re sick.  They are literally going to separate families for any positive tests and the tests are geared more toward false positives than false negatives.  It is a police state and socialism has conquered the world.”

                “You never agree with me on these things.  What happened?”

                “It’s blatantly obvious with things that come out.  I mean  I hate Trump as much as the next guy but not allowing people to work and forcibly removing them from their homes all in the name to destroy the success he had with the economy is going too far.”

                “Don’t I know it.”

                They arrive in St. John’s and check into their hotel.  Just like the other Caribbean destinations, there are not many people there.  Since St. John’s is predominantly run by tourism, they love their new visitors and are willing to allow them complete access to any beaches even if they deny locals the same courtesy.  Kera and Fanis buy beer and drink on their balcony before turning in. 

                The next day, Kera meets up with her client and Fanis waits outside with the other security guards.  He strikes up a conversation with one knowing that they are about to talk about politics as that’s what everyone wants to talk to Americans about.  The guard inquires, “What do you think about all this Russian collusion stuff?”

                “I think it’s obviously a hoax.  There hasn’t been a shred of evidence in three years and there’s a lot of evidence that he was set up and members of his campaign have been entrapped.”

                “Yea, I saw someone call it the greatest fiasco in his over 50 years of journalism.”

                “That was Brit Hume of Fox”

                “Yea, all because they hate President Trump.’

                “Yup and Hume normally doesn’t inject his opinion.  He’s a straight news guy so it’s saying something he came out like this.”

                “Why won’t the Washington Post, New York Times and the other big media people just retract everything?”

                “It’s worse, they’re doubling down.  They keep pushing it and they’re doing the same thing with the Wuhan Virus.”

                “How do you figure?”

                “Anything that points to opening, they are against and anything pointing to keeping it locked down, they approve.”

                “Yea, I noticed that too.  They keep praising Cuomo and Hogan because they want to stay locked down till August.”

                “Cuomo killed people by forcing nursing homes to take in Wuhan Virus patients.  He even sent them with body bags.”

                “What about CNN?”

                “They have the worst guy of them all.  This dumbass, Brian Stelter, is trying to tell us that we are only talking about the Russian Collusion hoax and the setup of Mike Flynn to distract from the Wuhan Virus.  He talked more about the Russian collusion allegations than anyone on the planet.  It never ceases to amaze me how easily and comfortably the media contradicts themselves and engage in hypocrisy.”

                “I think this is the end of the world.”

                “Unfortunately, I agree with you.”

                Just as they were getting into it, the door opens and Kera emerges.  Fanis bids farewell to the guard and they head to the beach.  As they put their towel down, they each strip to their bathing suits and dart toward the water diving in.  They hang out in the water for a while and then retreat back to their towel.  As they are laying out, a man approaches and questions, “You from America?”

                Fanis responds, “Originally yes, but now we live in London.”

                “Do you know that your Speaker has just proposed a $ 3 Trillion spending bill?”

                “Yes, we are aware.”

                “You do realize that there is no money to do this.  There was no money for the last three or four either.”

                Fanis noticed the venom in the man’s voice so he got up and stepped so that Kera was behind him.  He responded, “There’s not much we can do about it.  She is actively destroying the economy just to hurt Trump.  It’s sick and sadistic but we’re not government officials.”

                “Why don’t the Republicans block it or Trump veto it?”

                “The Republicans are pussies and Trump likes the roller coaster.  That’s why he applied for bankruptcy nine times.  He likes people thinking that he’s down and out only to do the impossible and resurrect it.”

                “That’s fine with your money but now with a country’s”

                “I agree with you.  It was my biggest fear when he was running.  It sucks that it came true.”

                “Don’t you realize that the world economy runs on America?  If you fail, the whole world fails.”

                “I do realize that but again there’s nothing I can do.”

                “Call your congressman”

                “We don’t live in America anymore.”

                “Pelosi’s bill has stuff that has nothing to do with the virus.”

                “I know, she wants to get rid of the SALT deductions, which did exactly what Democrats always say they want; it taxed the rich and left the poor alone.  Since it attacks property taxes, and Pelosi’s San Francisco district has the highest property taxes in the country, it’s no wonder she wanted that in there.”

                “She’s not even pretending this time.  She specifically said she wants to bailout states without any stipulation that it has be virus related.”

                “That’s because she wants the federal government to bailout Democrat states for decades of money mismanagement.”

                “Is it just Democrat states?”

                “Pretty much.  Florida has more people than New York but their budget is half that of New York’s yet it’s cleaner and has fewer potholes.”

                “They are increasing the unemployment benefits.”

                “All that means is that people who lost their job are less likely to go back to work even if they’re allowed to.”

                “Why is the postal service and student loan forgiveness on there?”

                “Because Pelosi is retarded.”

                “How can you just sit there and do nothing about it?”

                “There’s nothing I can do.”

                The man shoved Fanis, “You’re an American.  You can call the representatives from when you used to live in America.”

                Fanis glared at him and declared, “If you touch me again, you will regret it.”

                “Oh yea” as the man took a swing at Fanis who ducked. 

                As the man spun back, Fanis swung his left fist into his jaw knocking him down.  He then put his hands up in retreat as he just wanted to discourage him for continuing the fight.  The man nodded and apologized so Fanis put his guard down thinking that it had the desired effect.  The man drove a fist into Fanis’ stomach and put him in a headlock.  He knew what he was doing as he sprawled his legs to increase the pressure on Fanis’ neck but lower his center of gravity to make it extremely difficult for Fanis to lift him up.  Fanis maneuvered his thumbs in between the man’s palms and then snapped his head down breaking the grip.  The man unleashed a flurry of fists but Fanis dodged them all and when he stopped to catch his breath, Fanis grabbed his arm and pulled him toward him as he drove his knee into his solar plexus.  Fanis reached down and grabbed the man’s hair on the back of his head and drove his face into his knee repeatedly. 

                The man dropped to his knees and Fanis let go of his head allowing him to collapse face down in the sand.  Fanis panted more out of anger than exhaustion and shook his head.  He scurried forward and kicked the man in side repeatedly before stomping on his back as he taunted him for blaming him for the economic collapse of America perpetuated by the state governors; mostly blue states. 

                Fanis reached down and grabbed the man by the sides and gingerly hoisted him up.  He bent down and wrapped his arms around the man’s legs and straightened his knees putting the man over his shoulder he then walked to the water and unceremoniously slammed the top half of his body into the water.  Now that he was in the water, he was easier to maneuver and Fanis turned him over and shoved his head under water.  Although the man was unconscious before, the realization that he was about to die woke him up.  He squirmed and thrashed trying to get his head above water but Fanis had a strong hold of him and soon his body went limp. 

                Fanis took a deep breath and exited the water and Kera was already packing up their stuff.  When he got back, she stated, “Well, I guess our beach day is over.  Come on now, we need to get our stuff and get the fuck out of here.”

                “I’m sorry.”

                “Do you feel better?”

                “Yes, I do.”

                “Good, Mike Flynn is still a political prisoner though.”

                “Yea, but I’m not as upset about it as I was before.”

                Kera giggled, “Awesome” she blurted out

                They go back to the hotel and get their stuff and board the plane.  On the plane, Kera articulates, “Maybe, we should avoid Flynn for the time being.”
                “Why? I got my catharsis.”

                “I know I don’t want to ruin that.”

                “It doesn’t matter.  Marie Yovanovitch has popped up again.”

                “The former Ambassador to Ukraine.”

                “Yea, the one that testified under oath that she didn’t know much about Burisma and never met any of their officials nor was ever briefed.  She admitted that she had talked to Joe Biden and Barack Obama but not Hunter and never about Burisma.   Turns out she was lying.”

                “She perjured herself?””

                “Yea, contacts have just been exposed between the US Embassy and Burisma and she was the head of the embassy.”

                “That’s circumstantial.  It could have just been people at the embassy and not necessarily her.”

                “Unlikely but there were state department memos showing Burisma wanted to polish their image before Trump took office.”

                “If you’re going to convict her of perjury, you need to have evidence she talked to Burisma, not the embassy.”

                “You mean like the e-mail she received in September 2016 about how Burisma hired an American firm named Blue Star Strategy to help their reputation and how they elected Hunter Biden to their board?”

                “Yes, that’s exactly what I mean.”

                “Or how about that there is documentations of a closed door meeting between Burisma representatives and Ambassador Yovanovitch?”

                “Now you’re getting it.  What were these meetings about?”

                “Pressuring Yovanovitsch to drop corruption charges against Burisma owner Zlochevsky.”

                “Well, with everyone distracted by Flynn and Covid19, they can work to get this without much opposition.”

                “Well, Senator Johnson of Wisconsin has subpoenaed records from Blue Star and the Atlantic Counsel but Romney is blocking it.”

                “Why is Romney blocking it?”

                “His friend works at Burisma.”

                “Ah, so now we know why he was the only Republican to vote to remove Trump from office.”

                “It’s all making sense now why the observer in January 2017 wrote that Ukraine tried to tip the election in Hillary’s direction.”

                “Where have I heard the Atlantic Counsel before?”        

                “It’s an anti-Russia group that’s heavily funded by Viktor Pinchuk, who is Hillary Clinton’s largest donor.”

                “There you go.”

                They arrive back in London and head to their flat and decompress from their long trip for a short period of time.  Before turning in, Kera gets serious with her cousin, “Look, I don’t know why you get so worked up over politics.  You need to calm down a little bit.  Even if socialism comes to America, black markets will emerge and I’m very good at grinding in black markets.” He gave a wry smile as he had a feeling that she was doing it even before the pandemic but said nothing.  Kera continued, “Fanis, I know you want to be kept in the dark about things that aren’t about buying and selling Chinese artifacts but it’s getting to a point where it might be inevitable for you to be keyed in.”

                “Well, let me know when we’re there.”

                “You may not have to hold your breath.”

 

Real Characters Episode 50 Finally a Win for the Democrats

                It is November 2019 and California Governor Newsom is looking at a report.  There has been a spike in Californians getting the flu so he declares that California is having an early flu season.  Aside from that, he doesn’t give much thought to it as his primary focus is how to destroy Donald Trump.  He has just gotten passed a bill known as ‘AB5,’ which will cripple free lance writers, car-share services, artists, and many other side hustles that Californians enjoy.  The original intent was to attack Uber and Lyft but the externalities will be far worse as after the New Year, approximately a million people will lose their jobs because of this.  This is all good news for Newsom because it will put a dent in President Trump’s vaunted record low unemployment rate.  Little does he know that AB5 would pale in comparison to what the thing he overlooked will do to the Donald Trump economy.

                In early January, President Trump issues a travel ban on China because he is concerned about a virus that had been unleashed in Wuhan, China.  Although the World Health Organization and China say it isn’t a serious threat and can’t be transmitted from human to human, President Trump is skeptical.  This leads to Democrats to incessantly attack him for being racist and xenophobic.  One by one the politicians in the two bluest states in the country; California and New York, come out and encourage people to come to Chinatown as it is safe and downplays the Wuhan Virus. 

                Over the next two months, the country will go into a panic over the virus and shut down.  Although the amount of things this halted is innumerable, one is that Attorney General Bill Barr and US Attorney of Connecticut John Durham can no longer travel the world as they investigate the origin and the investigation of whether or not President Trump colluded with Russia to win the 2016 election.  Around the peak of the crisis, Barr goes on Laura Ingraham’s show and calls the Russian collusion investigations one of the greatest travesties in American history because they investigated and spied on a president without any basis and did so solely to sabotage the presidency. 

                It has been an interesting couple of years for Bill Barr.  When he was first appointed, he casually took the job.  Given that he had already been attorney general once, it wasn’t too big of an honor.  He had also been the head of the FBI so he had done enough in politics for a lifetime and would have been just as content to go about his life never having a high law enforcement position again.  This attitude was precisely why he was chosen by President Trump to be the Attorney General to replace the fired Loretta Lynch.  Within months of taking the job, Barr would get confirmation that it would take someone with no political aspirations to have the job as Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi threatened to arrest him and put him in the prisons below the Capitol Building that hadn’t been used in recent memory.  Although supporters of the president were enraged by this, Barr was amused and when he saw Pelosi he asked if she brought the hand cuffs.  It was then that liberals realized they were dealing with someone who had no interest or need to kiss up to anyone.  As soon as his investigation was over, he would ride into the sunset. 

                Now that it has been a couple years since Barr took the job, conservatives were beginning to turn on him as well.  They were frustrated that Republicans and Trump supporters were being arrested left and right for process crimes and things that the FBI just made up.  All these reports had come out of malfeasance and errors by the FBI yet people like Mike Flynn were still on trial while Peter Strzok, Lisa Page, Andrew McCabe, Jim Comey, John Brennan, Jim Clapper and many others that actually had real evidence against them got away scot free.

                Barr’s report was supposed to come out in the springtime but now that it was April, it was looking like that wasn’t the case.  He did confirm to Ingraham that it was no longer just about the origins but they expanded the scope to cover into the Trump presidency in order to refute claims and denials from the intelligence community that the president was under investigation when he was no longer ‘president-elect’ Trump.  It doesn’t take too much of an imagination to know that he’s talking about the Mueller probe but he doesn’t explicitly say that. 

                After the interview, he goes back to his team to discuss the case.  Although his team is very familiar with the core of the report, Barr insists on repetition so it’s second nature to them.  He announces, “Okay, so who is the main focus on the culpability of this?”

                “John Brennan” comes a collective voice about the former head of the CIA.

                “What do we think about his claim that the origin was based on a mosaic of information?”

                “Completely false; it was all based on Steele’s dossier.” A man fires back

                “So that’s the CIA angle but does that absolve the FBI?”

                 “Well, Comey called it a corpus of intelligence so that’s the same lie.”

                “What about the claim that the CIA lied to the FBI so the FBI was fooled just like the FISA court was?”

                A woman in the group answers, “In January 2017, the FBI interviewed Steele’s sources and they all denied what Steele had said.  There were some things they claim Steele just made up that they said and others that he exaggerated and misrepresented.  After those interviews, there is no more plausible deniability for the FBI as they renewed the FISA three more times knowing it was based on a false document.”

                The first man added on, “Like Brennan said, it was the FBI’s job to vet and verify the information and in the process of them doing so, they knew it was false but went with it anyway.”

                The woman retorted, “Brennan is lying about that.  He included the dossier information in the president’s daily briefing.  The CIA doesn’t go around peddling unverified information.  Like we said, Brennan is the most culpable for this.”

                Barr interrupted, “Let’s just suffice it to say that they are both culpable.”

                The meeting adjourns and Barr is in his office privately reflecting on the case.  One of the things that most infuriates conservatives is that President Trump has given him the power to declassify any documents he wants.  He has yet to use that power but now he’s considering whether or not it’s time.  He sighs and calls Inspector General Horowitz.  He starts, “Good evening inspector general, how are you today?”

                “I’m doing as well as I can be.  This Coronavirus has everyone on edge.”

                “Yes, but our work is one of the few in this country that does continue.”

                “Of course sir.”

                “I wanted to let you know that I’m going to declassify the footnotes in your report last year.”

                “Which ones?”

                “That ones about Steele and his Russian sources.”

                “Are you sure you want to do that sir?  The British may be very upset with you as it embarrasses one of their former MI6 agents.  You and I both know that it clearly shows he was duped in a Russian disinformation campaign.”

                “It is with that knowledge that I have hesitated this long but I need a definitive answer to submit to the American people about what percentage of the dossier was completely fabricated by Steele and what was an active plot by Russian disinformation artists.”

                “With the tension with China right now over Covid19, are you sure you want to risk angering the Russians and the British?”

                “There is a new British Prime Minister right now of the opposing party as the one that oversaw England when Steele was up to his antics.  From what I hear, he is off the ventilator and recovering from his bout with Covid19 so I don’t think that will be an issue.  As for the Russians, given what they did to our country, I really don’t care what they think.”

                “Just between you and me, there are some things I don’t understand.”

                “I’ll do my best to answer but keep in mind there are things I can’t reveal to you.”

                “I understand that.  It’s nothing major but our investigations do have overlap.  When I saw the interview with Bill Priestap and pressed him on the Russian’s motives he couldn’t answer the question as to why the Russians wanted to denigrate Hillary Clinton and favor Donald Trump.  Do you have any answer to that?”

                “I’m a little concerned that Priestap was one of the highest ranking officials in the FBI and hasn’t figured that out after all this time.”

                “In fairness, neither have I.”

                “The Russians didn’t favor President Trump.  They wanted chaos.  Between Skolkovo and paying $ 500,000 for Bill Clinton to give a speech in Russia while Hillary was Secretary of State, they had a lot of dirt on her.  If she won, that’s what everyone would have been talking about but since she lost, people talked about this.”

                “How sure are you of this?”

                “Even Fiona Hill testified to this during the impeachment of the president.  If someone that hates the president admits this then it helps with the credibility as there is an incentive for them to deny this.”

                “Like all the other haters of the President have done.”

                “Yes”

                “The more I look into this, the more I’m believing that there are only two options.  Either the FBI and CIA were completely and utterly politically biased against Trump that they justified advancing information they knew to be false or they are really stupid and gullible.  I’m having trouble finding a third option.”

                “I haven’t been able to find one in my investigation either and I assure you Durham feels the same way.”

                “That’s scary to think.”

                “It is, but back to the reason I called.  Consider yourself warned and I do expect full cooperation from your office with this.”

                “Of course I will not inhibit you in any way but I just want to get it on the record that this new information will give the public clear information that the highest levels of our FBI lied to them and will fracture the bond and trust the American people have with our law enforcement.”

                “I’m afraid that damage has already been done.  Your opposition is duly noted but I do need to go forward with this.”

                “Yes sir.”

                “You have a good night.”

                “You too and stay safe.”

                “You as well.”

                Not too far away from Barr’s office, the Capitol Building is abuzz as they are in negotiations to pass phase four of the Coronavirus bill.  Senate Majority leader Mitch McConnell has taken the initial 4 Trillion dollar bill and condensed it to $250 Billion as it only includes aid to small businesses and doesn’t contain the Green New Deal riders the Democrats had put forth.  Just like with phase 3, negotiations were going very well until the Speaker of the House, who is not a member of the Senate, blocked it.  This caused a stalemate that pushed the aid back four days. 

                Senate minority leader Chuck Schumer calls Pelosi and poses, “Nancy, my state is getting hammered by this shut down and the virus. 34% of all the nation’s cases are in my state; our businesses really need this aid.”

                “Chuck, that’s what you said for phase 3 and look at all the riders I got through for the Kennedy Center, water in Utah, Forrest fire protection and many other things that had nothing to do with the virus.  I did it once, I can do it again.”

                “What was your problem with the bill?”

                “It was on a first come first serve basis.  We can’t have that.  We need to virtue signal the minorities and add identity politics into this.  Think of the end game; we need to oust Trump in the election so we need to curry favor with the minorities.”

                “They already vote overwhelmingly in our favor.”

                “That is less true now than ever.  Blexit has really hurt our base so we need to keep beating it home that they need us.  This virus is the best thing that could have ever happened to us.”

                “Tell that to all my dead constituents.”

                “Don’t you see Chuck?  Our states were on the verge of bankruptcy before this crisis.  This is our chance to get a federal bailout.  The numbers are tapering off as the models completely overestimated this.  We can get the money that the models indicate we needed and use all the extra money to fund our personal endeavors.”

                “We did that in Phase 3”

                “That’s called a proof of concept.  That’s how I know I can do it again in Phase 4.  The President is under enormous pressure, he will cave again just like he did in the two omnibus bills and Phase 3.”

                “You are playing a dangerous game.  Even CNN and NBC are turning on us.”

                Pelosi’s tone turned serious, “What do you mean?”

                “They ran headlines that the Senate Democrats blocked the Coronavirus bill to help small businesses.”

                “What the fuck?  Shit, why didn’t you tell me this earlier?  Why didn’t you call them when you found out?  You’re wasting your time with me questioning something that I proved I was right about two weeks ago.  I got to go.  I’ll talk to you later.”

                Pelosi didn’t even wait for Schumer to hang up.  She immediately called the editors of CNN and NBC.  Schumer and many other Democrats did the same and it didn’t take long for them to change their headlines to read that both the Republicans and Democrats blocked the bill and they were at a stalemate. The change didn’t go unnoticed as conservatives broadcasted it all over their platforms to show how the media wasn’t even hiding that they were propaganda arms of the Democrat party and are ruled by them.

                Also in New York, Hillary Clinton has her feet kicked up on her desk in her home.  There is a cigar in her mouth and she is smiling as the state she lives in gets the worst of the pandemic.  She utters to her husband Bill, “We finally did it.  We finally tricked Trump into doing something stupid.”

                “Technically it was the governors that shut down.”

                “Yea, but the president was on record urging them to do so.  Now, his top expert, Dr. Fauci, has lowered his scenario from 100,000 dead to 60,000.”

                “Yes, and then when people attack the models, we can just claim victory.”

                “It’s weird.  This failed time and time again with Climate Change as nobody went into Draconian overexaggerated policy mode based on those models.  Then, when we use the same models for a virus, everyone falls for it.  It’s the same trick.”

                “Well, people have been touting the flu numbers.  60,000 is right in the range of people who normally die from the flu.”

                “It doesn’t matter, the damage has been done.  Even the hero Dewine had to lower his estimates from 160,000 to like 1,600”

                “We got most states on board.  Both the right and the left are criticizing anyone that doesn’t shut down but the adjustment in the models is giving the fringe conservatives that have been criticizing the lock down from the start ammunition.”

                “It doesn’t matter.  They lost.  Like you said, we explain away the models that our social distancing and shut down worked.  Just how between Inconvenient Truth and An Inconvenient Sequel, the polar bear population, a focus in the first one, had increased by six times by the sequel so Gore didn’t mention it.  Whenever someone points it out, Gore claims victory that since he raised awareness, efforts like the Paris Accords were made and we saved the polar bears.”

                “People know that the world didn’t follow those accords and Trump pulled out.”

                “It didn’t stop us from claiming victory and still many people believe us.  Now, we actually did drastic actions so of course they’re going to believe us now.”

                “Those models factored in 100% social distancing though.”

                “People are too dumb to realize that.   They believe what we tell them to believe.”

                The phone rings and Hillary sees that it’s Nancy Pelosi.  She answers, “Hello, Nancy.”

                “Hello Hillary.  How are you?”

                “I’m doing great.  Good job for blocking that bill.  We need to get funding for liberal causes.”

                “Yea, I can’t believe Schumer almost fell for it again.  I just yelled at him and then I had to yell at the media.  It’s like we’ve been losing so long, we’re forgetting what it’s like to win.”

                “Well, I haven’t forgotten.  You want to know what winning looks like?  JP Morgan just published a report about the economy contracting by 40% and unemployment hit 20%.  You thought you were so good when you raised it from 3.5% to 3.6% with AB5.”

                “Yea, and then the next month, Trump got it back to 3.5%”

                “So, we called our friends the Chinese and voila, 20%!  Run on that jackass!”

                “Honestly, this couldn’t have worked out any better for us; especially me.”

                “Yea, your state is mostly tech and Silicon Valley people.  They have no problem working from home.”

                “But all those blue collar, coal miners that keep complaining that we want to eliminate their jobs are being laid off en masse and it’s all being done under a President Trump administration.  Just how the SALT deductions only affected liberal states like California, New York and Illinois, we turned the table and issued a pandemic that only affects blue collar manufacturing people that Trump disproportionally helped over the last three years.  They enjoyed their 6% wage rates, which was double than the top income bracket and the income inequality was shrinking. Well, how does that feel now when we let China make your income 0?”

                “They should have thought of that before they embarrassed Biden forcing him to challenge one to a fight.”

                “We do need to talk to him about that.”

                “Yea, that’s why Barack hasn’t endorsed him yet and he’s the only nominee left!”

                “It feels good to stick it to the blue-collar workers.  They always think they’re so important but they’re just dumb people.  We need them from the neck down but lately they’ve wanted to think.”

                “Yea, but they got what was coming to them.”

                “Honestly, I’m really surprised at how well this pandemic has gone for us; especially me.”

                “Yea, California has really been spared the brunt of this.”

                “New York has half our population and 14 times the cases.”

                “I know, I’ve seen the numbers.”

                “Yea, a new study says that we may have gotten a herd immunity since so many Chinese people had flown here; even from Wuhan.”

                “Well, you did have that early flu season in November.”

                “Yea, we think that it was actually a mild case of this but it gave our population the antibodies.  They are confirming it now.”

                “Don’t publicize that too much.  We want it to be that you shut down and implemented shelter-in-place and social distancing precautions.”

                “Don’t worry I know; but New York only followed our policy three days after we did.  It’s hard to justify the difference in our numbers from just three days.”

                “Don’t let the truth get in the way of a good story.”

                “You’re preaching to the choir on that one.”

                “There’s just one thing that isn’t going so well for us.”

                “The 20 or so states that didn’t shut down.”

                “Yea, we can’t have anything challenge our narrative.  There can be no opportunity for people to compare states that closed down vs. states that didn’t as it devastates our case and hurts our authoritative narrative.”

                “We have contingencies.  We just tell people that nobody lives in those states.  For something like South Dakota, it’s believable.”

                “Doesn’t matter; we can’t give scientists a control group.”

                “We are constantly putting pressure on them to follow suit.  There’s not much more we can do.”

                “You can do what they did in England; guilt private sector people.  Tell them that their selfishness in going to work puts public sector jobs like subway drivers at risk because they have to go to work and risk their lives for them.”

                “Public transportation isn’t too popular in South Dakota.”

                “Yes, but you let the people in the cities, where most of them live, know that if someone goes to work, then they are selfish assholes putting the poor little public sector workers’ lives in danger.”

                “Are you saying that public sector lives are more important the private sector lives?”

                “That’s exactly what I’m saying and that is what every sheep that stays home will be saying too; though they won’t realize it.”

                “It is a minor hiccup.  My phase 3 bill giving furloughed employees 100% of their salary will inhibit them from going back to work.  We finally created a welfare state just like Europe.  Now, they will be begging us for the scraps from our table as we constantly remind them of Covid19 and why they need us!”

                “I don’t mean to minimize your work but now is not the time to rest on your laurels.  There is one more loose end and that’s the states that haven’t shut down.  Tell them that your models suggest that they will be the next epicenter. This disease hurts diabetic people and the Midwest is all obese people so that will make it a believable story.”

                “I got this under control Hillary.  Nobody is resting here.  I flew back from California to get Phase 3 passed the way I want it.  I’m doing the work and I have no intention of slowing down.”

                “Good, you’ve been a good ally in this.  Thank you.”

                “Of course.”

                With that, the conversation ends.  Hillary Clinton then calls the New York Times’ Maggie Haberman.  She answers the phone, “Yes Ma’ame.”

                “Hi, Maggie.”

                “What can I do for you?”

                “I want you to write an article saying that because of Covid19, we can’t ever have in-person voting again.”

                “We have been saying that and the conservatives keep talking about how easy it is to defraud mail-in voting.”

                “Then release a statement saying it’s extremely rare.”

                “I would but we wrote an article in 2012 saying that mail-in votes are less likely to be counted.  In fact, it was twice as likely for a mail-in vote to be lost than it was for an in-person vote.  Two percent of mail-in ballots are never counted and hit a dead end.”

                “Nobody remember 2012.  Back then, people were talking about the end of the world because the Mayans said so.”

                “Conservatives have done a good job of finding old articles to discredit us.  I’m going to look retarded if I come out.”

                “When have my enormous media conglomerate army and my mob also known as the IRS and DOJ not had your back?”

                “Never” Maggie replied timidly

                “Then do as I say!”

                “Yes Ma’ame” she rejoined defeated. 

                “If you’re nervous about it, play the racial card.”

                “How do I do that?”

                “Say what we always do; that blacks and Hispanics are too dumb to know how to vote in person so if you attack mail-in voting, you’re a racist that hates blacks, Hispanics and the poor.”

                “I’ll soften the language up a bit but yea, I think that’ll work.”

                “Of course it’ll work.  It always works especially with the momentum we have now.”

                Hillary gets off the phone frustrated.  She can’t believe that people are failing to realize that the general public doesn’t have the same information and knowledge that her and her cronies do.  The conservatives have a very limited reach and now that people know people that died from the Wuhan Virus, nobody is listening to them.  Her phone rings again and she takes a deep breath.  On the phone is the only person that can claim to have the same power over the Democrats as she does.  She clicks the ‘accept’ button and Barack Obama’s voice comes on the line, “Aloha Hillary.”

                “I take it you’re not in Martha’s Vineyard in your multi-million dollar home.”

                “No, I’m in Hawaii where they have one of the lowest numbers of cases in the country.”

                “That’s probably a good idea.”

                “I bet Bill is really happy with the economic news that came out.”

                “There are so many good ones I’m not sure which you are referring to.”

                “The national debt has just surpassed $24 Trillion”

                “I hadn’t seen that but after spending two trillion, I figured we were close.”

                “This is going to be the most predictable bankruptcy in American history and yet nobody sees it coming.”

                “Well, although we are politicians, you know as well as I do that they’re all a bunch of self-absorbed, self-interested assholes.”

                “Yes, but some of us know how to play the game and profit over the destruction of the country.”

                “Too many people think it’s only about the money.  That’s nice but the power is so much better and more rewarding.”

                “Indeed.”

                “It’s a good thing you didn’t replenish the Federal stock piles of M-95 masks after the H1N1 epidemic in 2011.”

                “I know.  Could you imagine that piece of shit Trump coming to the rescue with those?  His poll numbers have already gone up but that would have really made him shine.”

                “Everyone is always worried about the present that they don’t bother to prepare for the future.  It’s always the mentality that we’ll just tackle that problem if it comes up so there’s no need to prepare.”

                “Kind of like how New York auctioned off their stock pile of ventilators in 2012 because they didn’t want to spend the money to maintain them.”    

                “Yea, they’re regretting that now.”

                “Do you think that maybe this pandemic will open their eyes?”

                “No.  Between the housing bubble that was blatantly obvious and getting rid of emergency stockpiles of supplies, people never learn.  All the signs of the American bankruptcy have been around for years.  That’s why Bill faked the surplus.  We’ve been warning about this for 20 years, and nobody does anything.  Americans think that they couldn’t possibly be like Venezuela, Japan or Argentina.  Only in America, will the economic collapse be slow and gradual.”

                “Just how Bear Stearns and Leyman Brothers went out of business gradually.  It wasn’t like an overnight thing where the entire financial sector just burst and collapsed.” Hillary’s voice had heavy sarcasm.

                “And when it does, we’ll be right there to institute 80s style interest rates.  Then, they’ll have no choice but to print money and skyrocket inflation.  With the mass unemployment that follows, who will they turn to?”

                “Big Brother and Big Sister government; us.”

                “We’re finally almost there.”

                “We just need to stay vigilant and make it so that Trump can’t rebound the economy.”

                “Nancy has done a good job with that with overspending in the stimulus bills.”

                “I just spoke to her.  She has her head on right.”

                “I didn’t speak to her and I know that.”

                “True”

                “Well, I’m going to get going.  We’ll have a nice expensive bottle of champagne when Trump loses the election because his precious economy is in ruins.  We’ll drink another bottle when America declares bankruptcy.”

                “Thank you China”

                “Yes.  Thank you Shi Zenghali”