Self-security and friends

Most people feel better about themselves when they say they get along with everyone and have many friends.  Not only is this not often the case, but the opposite is more true.  Someone who is secue with themselves doesn't need a lot of friends.  They don't need the constant vertification that it's okay for them to be them.  Because of this, the quantity of friends is low but the quality is high because you attract self-secure people who accept you for you.  Then there is no need to pretend to be someone else, live a lie, or do what most people do to try to get friends.  Afterall, it's very easy to keep the friends you got by being you.

Fried Chicken and watermelon

Recently I heard a black person get extremely upset because a white guy said, "I like friend chicken and watermelon too."  Immediately the white guy was called racist.  How is that a racist comment?  In Greece, it is extremely common to have watermelon after your meal for dessert.  In fact, I don't know many people who don't like the taste of fried chicken or watermelon.  The only problem the people I know have with fried chicken is that it's fattening.  How did this become a black thing? Why is it racist for a white person to like it? 
      Let's just pretend it was a black thing.  Why do blacks hate when whites enjoy their culture.  Other cultures from the Greeks to the Dominicans, to Mexicans to Puerto Ricans love to show their culture.  Jews don't get mad if I say I like challah.  Greeks don't get mad if someone likes galaktoboutiko or baklava.  Dominicans don't get mad if you like mangoes and platanos so why do black people get offended if people like watermelon and fried chicken?

I've even heard blacks complain about blacks openly admitting that they like watermelon and fried chicken.  Two years ago, NBA star Josh Childress had a Youtube video of him eating fried chicken and watermelon. The next day a black basketball analyst named Stephen Bardo said something along the lines of how disrespectful this generation is because his dad would have slapped him in the back of the head if he did something to put black people back like that.  He went on to say that blacks are trying hard to fight against the stereotypes against them.  Why would you fight against that stereotype?  Who really cares?  How does it set black people back in their civil rights fight if some blacks are unashamed that they like watermelon and fried chicken?  Well, I'll just say this, call me a racist, I love watermelon and fried chicken so if you don't want yours, I'll eat it.

Finding yourself.

People always ask me how is it that I can be so secure with myself.  How is it that I can act the same no matter who's around?  Why am I the way I am?  They ask this because they want to know themselves and they want to have that same self-awareness and self-knowledge that I have.  Some find this through therapy or graphology but for me, use the money you would spend on that stuff to travel abroad. 
         Once you leave your home country and you're in a foreign place, the only thing you have is time to reflect. Ideally, you want to do this without a close friend because when you're abroad, you're surrounded with people that you know you may never see again.  You also are not in the environment you grew up in.  I'm a firm believer of "You can take someone out of the city but you can never take the city out of the person" but when you're in a different environment amongst people you may never see again, there's no reason not to act yourself.  Nobody to impress, nobody to fit in with, no reason to go against your nature.  For me, it was sitting on the edge of a cliff by myself over the Aegean in Greece with the Mountains as background.  For others it may be the clean water of the Carribbean, or the pyramids of Egypt, but when you force yourself in solitude, all there is is time to self-reflect.  And then, you just might find who you are.

Fan comment about my book

i'm loving your book. 

i only read 2 chapters so far but i really am enjoying it.  ill let you know what i think as i go.

i can hear your voice reading it to me in my head.. kinda creepy

~Joe ~ Denver, CO

Hate

      Recently I have been yelled at because I use the word "Hate" a lot.  People believe it is wrong to hate but hating is just as natural as loving.  There is a reason that there is a thin line between love and hate, they're both born out of passion.  They only differ in where that passion takes you.  I know what I hate, it allows me to be able to avoid those things so I can avoid them. 
                    The point is though, your hate should be based from your own personal experience not what you've heard.  Do not be afraid to have an opinion of something after having tried it only once.  You do not need to waste any more time on things you've experienced and found you hate.  Do not be afraid to hate or admit you hate something, for if you can hate, then that means you can love.  The reverse is also true, if you cannot hate, you cannot love.  Therefore, the opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference.

Feminism

        It seems that in the mass media and entertainment, the perception that men can never win a contest over woman is jammed down your throat.  Now, in a way, men are to blame for this because they do put on an air of incompetence to get out of doing boring tasks like cleaning and changing diapers so we can't be blamed if this sharade works.  The problem is when it gets to an extreme.
      Feminism has killed chivalry because new age women want so much to be men.  Just because they want to act like men, doesn't make them men.  Just as how New York men are still men even though they act like women (see my book).  I have been yelled at almost every time I've walked a girl home in New York.  They think that I am hitting on them.  The reality is, this is how I was raised, men should never let girls walk home alone at night.  The reason, which may surprise you, has nothing to do with my ability to fight versus the girl I'm walkig home.  The point is, the odds that I will have to prove that I can fight is much lower than the girl would have to prove that she can fight.  Take the Puerto Rican day parade a couple years back.  Three women were raped in broad daylight...one of which was a kickboxing instructor.  The point is, men are dumb enough to get themselves killed defending a woman.  Ask any cop what are the worst fights they see...it's men fighting over woman.  Humans are predators, and like all predators, they go after what they perceive as vulnerable and they perceive women by themselves as vulnerable and don't care about men by themselves.  It is taught that if you come face to face to a lion, the worst thing to do is run.  They can outrun you and everything it has killed ran first. If you stand your ground and make loud and aggressive noises, the lion may think you can defend yourself and you will be less likely to prove it (good thing, because you'll fail that test).  Humans act the same way, a man they look as another predator ready for the fight, a woman they view as running prey.
    The other reason is that they may want something from the female that they don't from the male...namely intercouse that they have no qualms of taking by force. It is a fact that women are less likely to be attacked when with a male than by themselves....It is not true that men by themselves are more likely to be attacked than men with women or men with other men.  So women, if a man walks you home, let him, it's safer that way because of the perception that predator men have.  Do not feel that you owe the man anything if they do though becuase people should never be rewarded for doing what they're supposed to do. 
 
   

Forever 21...Grow up

This is going to be very short.  I think I've discovered a problem in today's society.  Everybody wants to live in Neverland.  Nobody wants to admit they are grown up.  We glorify "Cougars" now as the feminist movement has gotten so ridiculous that older women are going after college students or young men.  Women are looking for young meat during the mid-life crisis just as how men notoriously have in the past.  You have parents who want to be their kids' friends rather than admit they don't listen to the same music or watch the same shows they do.  They try so hard to be hip.  It bothers me that though people at work are my parent's age they all listen to the same music that I listened to growing up.  It doesn't endear them to me it's creepy.       
      Once the generation gap is blurred, kids do not have structure and discipline they need.  With no guidance, the future doesn't look too bright.  We live in a world where adults want to be kids and kids want to be adults.  Where will the moral compass come from?