Monday, November 11, 2019

Theo the Trump Employee Episode 35 Speaking Truth to Pravda


                Theo is leaving the White House, which, to him, is his place of employment.  He is on his way to a bar near Christian College.  Despite the name, Christian college is just as liberal as any other college campus.  As he sits down and gets a drink, he listens in on conversations to see if anyone is talking about politics.  He likes ruining college kids’ idea that they were in a safe space and an echo chamber for their ideas.  He was a little encouraged that nobody really called him out that they were in a safe space but that’s not to say they enjoyed his opposition.  It didn’t take long for someone to bring up something to attract Theo.  He overheard a girl exclaim, “I don’t know if I agree with healthcare for the entire world.”

                The guy she was speaking to snapped back, “That’s a myth.  Politifact called that mostly false.”

                Theo turned to him and asked, “Didn’t you see the debates?”

                The guy took a step back and hesitantly answered, “Yes, I did.”

                “And when the moderator asked who here’s health plan will support undocumented aliens and every candidate raised their hand.  What did you think that meant?”

                “Politifact said that since they’re opening the border, there will be no undocumented workers again so they’ll be paying taxes, therefore it isn’t free.”

                “Think about what you just said.  If anyone comes to America, regardless of how they got here, they are automatically legal.  Then, they can get care before they even pay those taxes.”

                “I got to do a little more research on this.”

                “No, you just need to use common sense.  Denying the existence of illegal immigrants doesn’t change the fact that they exist.  Facts are facts.  When Corey Booker, Joe Biden and others say that anyone that wants care will get care and Sanders and Warren tells everyone that if they’re residents in America, they’ll be covered, then what do you think that means?”

                “ Why would Politifact call it ‘mostly false’ then”

                “They are liars.”

                “They are an independent, non-partisan company.”

                Theo burst out laughing.  When he was done, he declared, “That’s just what they claim.  Read their stuff, they almost never call anything a Democrat says as false but almost everything a Republican says as true.  Sometimes, it’s the exact same statement. T he only thing that changed is the party affiliation of the persons saying it. One gets a true label; the other gets a false.”

                “Well, everyone is biased”

                “Yes, and they are more than others.  As I just told you because Trump and the Republican aid both are absolutely categorically true with evidence in every single debate.  Yet, they call it mostly false.  That is an egregious lie.”

                “Enjoy your drink man.  I’m trying to talk to the nice lady.”

                Theo turned towards the bar.  He’s seen enough of these to not know what was to come next.  College girls liked older men because they assumed they were more mature.  At 35, Theo was seen as old to her.  Also, winning the debate makes him seem wise, which girls latch on to as long as you’re not contradicting them.  The girl walks up to him, “Hi, I’m Sabrina”

                “Theo” he said as she shook her hand.

                “That was pretty interesting what you were saying.  Can I ask you about current events?  Do you follow the news?”

                “Yes, it’s kind of my job.  This is also D.C. so you have to keep informed.”

                “What’s going on with this impeachment hearing?”

                “It all stemmed from a man named Mark Zaid.  He’s the lawyer for the Whistleblower.”

                “Okay”

                “Ever since Trump won the presidency, he’s been openly admitting on twitter that he wants to take down Trump.  During last year’s midterm elections, Zaid called radio stations and already talked about impeaching Donald Trump because his son made a phone call to a blocked number.  Zaid wanted to know who that blocked number was and if Democrats win the house back, they can find out and prosecute President Trump for it.  As you know, nothing ever came to that because Trump Jr. didn’t call his father.  Then, poof, the story died.”

                “I don’t really know where you’re going with this.”

                “For three years, all this guy has been talking about is trying to find a way to impeach President Trump.  Being the Whistleblower’s attorney is just his chance to do that.  He is partisan and has had a three year agenda.  He’s not reacting to disturbing information; he’s fabricating it because he has failed to find something concrete for three years.”

                “Alright, so I get his motives but what’s actually happening?”

                “The head of the house intelligence committee, Adam Schiff is denying due process.  He won’t let Republicans call any witnesses in defense of the president. He only wants his witnesses to be heard but not the other side.”

                “Can he do that?”

                “Honestly no, but given how the deep state hates the president, they’ve been throwing away the rule of law.  Schiff accused Trump of obstruction for much less than this.  If President Trump withheld one witness, which he was allowed to do, they would have tried to claim obstruction.  Schiff denied all the GOP witnesses.”

                “Why?”

                “Well, his own witnesses have contradicted his claim and proven him to be a liar.  His witnesses were the ultimate sham because all of them had hearsay testimony, which isn’t even admissible in court.  The last guy they had up there; Bill Taylor, admitted that his information was fourth hand.”

                “How do they disagree with him?”

                “First, they all say there’s nothing in the transcript where Trump offered or demanded a quid pro quo.  Second, they all admit that the transcript is authentic and a word for word account; not a memo.”

                “I heard on the View that it was...”

                “Pretty much everything the View panel said when they had Donald Trump Jr. on was a lie.”

                “What witnesses do the Republicans want to bring?”

                “Well, the highest ranking Republican is Devin Nunes.  He’s asked Devon Archer, who was a board member of Burisma, plays golf with Joe Biden, and is very big in Ukrainian energy.  Next, we have Hunter Biden himself as a Burisma board member.  Burisma is Ukraine’s largest energy company and Hunter Biden was paid a ridiculous sum of money to be on the board even though he had no energy experience of any kind.  Going away from Burisma, they want to talk to Alexandra Chalupa, who worked with the Ukrainian embassy when she worked for the DNC.  Chalupa arranged a meeting with former Ukrainian President Porochenko through the embassy=.  She gathered negative information about, then, Trump’s campaign manager Paul Manafort in order to hurt Trump.  Basically, she colluded with Ukraine to take down Donald Trump through his campaign manager.  Manafort left shortly after.”

                “That’s an extensive list.”

                “That’s just the first wave; he’s got a second one.”

                “Who are they?”

                “Kurt Volker, who was a US envoy to Ukraine.  Nellie Ohr, who works for Fusion GPS and handed the Steele dossier to her husband Bruce Ohr, who was the fourth highest member in the DOJ.  He then gave it to Joe Pientka, who was his FBI handler.  Also, Eric CIaramella, who is the whistleblower himself.  Since Ciaramella wasn’t on the call, Nunes wants to interview everyone that CIaramella heard from.”

                “Didn’t the View say….”

                “It’s only illegal for the intelligence community inspector general to release the whistleblower’s name.  Neither me, Donald Trump Jr. or any one of the numerous people on Twitter or conservative media outlets hold that title.  Like I said, everything the View said was a lie.”
                “Alright, so he’s got a name.”

                “Well, given that I work for the White House, I can tell you some things about my former co-worker.”

                “I’m listening”

                “Eric CIaramella Is 33-years-old, registered Democrat, worked for the White House during the Obama administration and previously worked with Joe Biden and John Brennan.  He left Trump’s National Security Council in 2017 after he was accused of leaking information to the media.  He then returned to the CIA and huddled for guidance with staff of House Intelligence Committee Chairman Adam Schiff.”

                “You think he’s helping his old boss Joe Biden?”

                “Well, Biden did invite him as his special guest at a White House Banquet.  I have to tell you, people at his level, GS-13, don’t get those invitations from the Vice President.”

                “Brennan has nothing to do with Ukraine though.  He’s not even the CIA director anymore.”

                “There were two deep state operations to try to take down Donald Trump.  The first one was a coordinated DNC effort to work with foreign media to hurt Donald Trump.  They colluded with Australia, England and Ukraine to do this.  That’s where Chalupa comes in; the Ukraine angle.  Nellie Ohr would be the England angle.”

                “Alright”

                “Then, you needed to get the political information to the FBI but it couldn’t look like it came from the same source when it did.  They needed to launder the information so former MI6 operative, Christopher Steele, who was a CIA and FBI informant, leaked his dossier, written by Fusion GPS’ Glenn Simpson, to the media and multiple other people.  They, in turn, all told the FBI.  Since the FBI was hearing the same information from multiple sources, they thought it was corroborating each other but really it was all from the same person.”

                “This is sounding serious.”

                “Only because it is.”

                “Why haven’t I heard Ciaramella’s name?”

                “Well, I assume you get your news from Google, YouTube, Twitter and other social media outlets.”

                “Yea”

                “Those sites banned the use of his name.”

                “Why?”

                “They say it’s because they’re afraid of his safety if released.”

                “Oh, well that’s good then.”

                “No, that means you can never say anything negative about anyone ever.  Besides, liberals attack people that don’t agree with them, not conservatives.”

                “Oh come on, you can’t stereotype like that.”

                “Look at ANTIFA, the diner that liberals tried to close for serving food to pro-2nd amendment people, Candace Owens and Charlie Kirk getting accosted and water thrown at them at a Philadelphia restaurant, millions of dollars of damage in any of their protests, so many rapes during occupy wall street that they had to set up safety tents….”

                “I get your point.”

                “I told you a bunch of liberal examples, give me one conservative example.”

                “Neo-Nazi ‘s and White Supremacists”

                “The head of the Alt-Right, Duke, says his favorite president is Johnson and Polk, both Democrats.  President Trump has said they should be condemned totally.  They’re not on our side.  Maxine Waters, on the other hand, told people to assault republicans in all public events and she’s a Democrat Senator.”

                “I don’t know, I always hear of them being right-wing.”

                “Again, you’re lied to.  Now, even the White Supremacists and neo-Nazi’s don’t dox.  Name a conservative that has?”

                Sabrina hesitates for a minute, “I can’t think of any off hand.”

                “Exactly”

                “Do you think there’s going to be a red wave reaction to all this?”

                “I can never predict elections.  I think it’s interesting that a Republican named Roxy just won in a very blue county in Maryland.  I think it’s called Prince George or something.  It’s just as liberal as D.C. and a Republican won.  That may be something about the Democrat that was running against her, I don’t’ really know but it’s a sign I guess.”

                “I’m getting kind of bored of this bar, you want to go somewhere?”

                “I’m going home.”

                “Do you want company?”

                “No, that’s okay.  I’m a little old for you.”             

                “I’m 21, I’m legal.”

                “I’m 35.”

                “So what, I’ve hooked up with guys older than you before.”

                Larry smiled, “And you probably will again, however, it won’t be me tonight.”

                Sabrina shrugged her shoulders trying to hold in the hurt she felt from being rejected.  Theo goes on to the train and heads home.  A man in his mid-20s sits on the train and rests his head back and groans.  Theo chuckles and inquires, “Rough day?”

                “Yea, you know how it is.  Washington is so damn expensive, we have to work long hours just to survive.  I don’t know if you know who AOC is but she warned about this before.”

                “Yea, but she was wrong.  First of all, having multiple jobs has nothing to do with the unemployment rate.  The unemployment rate is measured by the amount of people looking for work over the amount of people working.  For the record, her comment has nothing to do with it but let’s pretend that it did.’

                The guy laughed, “Alright”

                “If everyone is working multiple jobs; that means for each additional job, they’re stopping someone else from having that job.  That means one or more less people have a job, which means the unemployment rate would be higher.”

                “She also talked about the amount of hours we work.”

                “Which again has nothing to do with the unemployment rate.  Her comment was trying to explain why a low unemployment rate is bad.  She failed miserably for anyone that knows what the unemployment rate actually is.”

                “Fine, forget the unemployment rate and just take the concern she had.”

                “Well, we can test that.  The number of Americans that have more than one job is lower now than it was in the mid-90s.  Right now, 7.8 Million people work multiple jobs; that represents 5% of American workers.  In the 1990s, it was 6%.”

                “Do you happen to have studies about the amount of hours work?  I got to work at 7:30AM, it’s 7:00 and I’m just going home now.”

                “According to studies, from 1979-2002, the amount of hours people work has declined.  If you break it down by income bracket, it’s even more interesting.”

                “What do you mean?”

                “There was a 14.4% increase in working hours for people in the top quintile of wage owners but a drop by 6.7% in lowest quintile.”

                “You’re saying that the people who make the most money, work the longest hours.”

                “Yup, so this only starving people who can barely afford their rent being the hardest workers is a myth according to the data.”

                “That brings up another problem. The income inequality is getting greater.  The Middle class is disappearing.”               

                “Yea, because they’re getting richer.  The number of people in the lowest quintile has dropped drastically but the people in the top have grown.  The middle class also declined.  What does that mean to you?”

                “I guess they leave that part out when they report this.”

                “They do.  Let’s look at median incomes in America to see if I’m right.”

                “it’s almost like you prepared for this.”

                “Under Bush, middle incomes grew $401, but the economy was flying high as there was the housing bubble.  Maybe not too much growth to had when you’re that high right before a bubble bursting.”

                “Yea, the great recession happened right after that.”

                “Then, Obama, after a massive collapse, was tasked with growing.  Since he started from a very low point, there should be huge gains.  Median incomes grew $1,043 during his eight years.”

                “That’s like two and half time Bush, so that’s good for Obama.”

                “Yea, but do you know what it is for Trump in less than half the time?”

                “Well, we hit record highs in the stock market, so I have a feeling this is going to be big.”

                “$5,240”

                “Where did you get this?”

                “The Census Bureau, the most accurate source.”

                “I read an article in the Washington Post that it was from a private firm.”

                “It’s called Sentier Research.”

                “Right”

                “They got their data from the Census Bureau.”

                “Oh, so it is the same source.”

                “Yea, that’s why we call Washington Post ‘fake news’ because they say things that are technically true but misleading.”

                “I’m not going to call them fake news but in this case, you have a point.”

                “Also, when they talk about Obama doing it.  Trump reversed most of Obama’s economic policy. His own advisers estimated a growth a fraction of what it is now.  Even Obama remarked that his bringing back manufacturing jobs and what he would do for the economy and job creation was akin to waving a magic wand.  President Trump delivered on everything he said.  As far as I know, no magic wand was used.  If Obama couldn’t even imagine it, how can he take credit for it?”

                “I think I’m going to have to get a little more skeptical”

                Theo arrived at his stop and exited.  He went to his house and watched the NBA before going to bed.  It was just another day in his life of defending the president against people misinformed and brainwashed by his opponents. 

 

No comments:

Post a Comment