Fanis and Kera are cousins that
live together in London, England. Kera
is an international Chinese art dealer and Fanis is her bodyguard. Like most days, Fanis was up before Kera and
watching sports highlights from the day before.
He had a jail broken Firestick that allowed him to catch all the
American channels so he could maintain his morning ritual of eating cereal and
watching ESPN’s Sportscenter.
Although Kera and Fanis lived in
London, they were born and raised in America.
Kera spent her first 27 years in New York but the last three in
London. Fanis spent his childhood in
Cleveland, Ohio and his adulthood, up until a year ago, in New York. In 2001, Fanis was just starting his senior
year of high school and Kera was a Freshman in high school. Back then, Fanis didn’t know New York very
well. All he knew about Kera’s school
was that it was in Manhattan and she lived in Brooklyn.
When Kera woke up, Fanis got up
and walked to her and gave her a big hug.
Kera hugged him back a little confused with the outward sign of
affection. She knew that Fanis was a
hugger but this was a little out of the ordinary and he seemed to be squeezing
harder than normal. It was as if they
didn’t see each other every day. When
Fanis finally let go, Kera asked, “What was that?”
“It’s September 11”
“I know”
“No, I’m not sure you do. 18 years ago, I called you repeatedly but
there was no service anywhere in New York.
I spent all day worrying that you were dead until finally cell service
was restored at night. The first tower
was hit at 8:48AM. It was over 12 hours
not knowing if you were alive”
“You know my school was like
four miles from ground zero”
“I didn’t know that at the time”
“Oh right, you were living in
Cleveland. Well, I was perfectly
fine. It was a really scary day because
the trains weren’t running but I made it home eventually.”
“I know that now”
“Let’s just hope it doesn’t
happen again. I mean a Russian spy was
just burned by Trump because in May 2017, Trump was briefed how ISIS was planting
bombs in laptops to bring down planes.
Trump had the bright idea to share it with Russia and since they knew
that only one guy knew that, they knew he was the source.”
Fanis smiled. Kera wanted to lighten the mood by making fun
of the president and she succeeded. He
responded, “Yea, apparently there’s no way anyone could have found out about
the April 1, 2017 CNN article about the exact same topic.”
Kera looked up CNN articles for
that date and found it. Her shoulder
slumped as she confusingly muttered, “But, why wouldn’t CNN know what they
themselves had reported on? It was on
CNN I heard that Trump telling the Russians about this burned the source.”
“Later in the article they admit
that at the end of the Obama administration, they were concerned about the
source. They thought he was burned too
and wanted to extradite him but he refused”
“Wait, why did he refuse?
“Good question. There are several speculative theories”
“Oh God, here we go. Your deep state conspiracies”
“That’s right.” He grinned “Many
believe that the source was a disinformation source. We know for sure that what he told America
was wrong. He helped Obama find dirt on
Trump that turned out to be false like all the other Russian collusion BS. What we don’t know, is if the source knew it
was false or not”
“So, he was either a useful
unknowing idiot or he was a double agent.”
Fanis had a shocked expression
as he was impressed she got that so quickly, “Yes, exactly”
“So, if it was disinformation,
why would they extract him?”
“They wanted Russia to think
that America believed the information and were taking it seriously. By trying to extract him, it sent a message
to Russia that they thought they had the goods.”
“Which would be another reason
why he wanted to stay because he wanted to get real information”
“True, but if the Russians are
already feeding him disinformation and know he’s sharing it with the US and
that we tried to extract him, it doesn’t seem plausible that they would ever
trust him with real information.”
“This seems a little
ridiculous. It’s like triple spy, 3D
chess. Things are never this
complicated. If they knew he was a spy,
they’d just kill him not try to use him to deliver false information.”
“You don’t think it’s better to
try to use your information to your advantage?
You don’t believe misinformation helps?
Hell, in World War II, we sent dummies as paratroopers to multiple
beaches in France. General Patton 3rd
army was held up nowhere near Normandy.
All so that there would be less Germans when we invaded Normandy so yea,
disinformation is used.”
“I get that but you haven’t
given me any reason to believe that this was it. All this trickery was done at the end of the
Obama campaign. That was November 8,
2016. He left office January 2017 but this
dude was still there May 2017. That’s a long time when this trickery failed for
him to stay in the country.”
“That’s my point. The Russians knew he didn’t know anything so
he wasn’t a threat. The Americans were
still trying to see if they could use him.”
“Do you have any proof?”
“When a spy gets burned and they
are extracted, the government, contrary to what movies will have you believe,
puts them in witness protection. They
are actually protected more than witness protection but if I say that then it
implies witnesses aren’t protected.
Anyway, how did these reporters find him so easily? If a reporter can find you, the Russians can
too. Why didn’t they protect him better
if he really screwed over Russia?”
“That definitely sounds like a
conspiracy”
“You think everything I say is a
conspiracy”
“I do, you’re right. Anyway, pack your shit, we’re leaving”
“Where are we going now?”
“Trinidad”
“Why do we keep going to the
Caribbean?”
“Because that’s where our
business is”
“Alright, I’m not complaining. Going to storm damaged beaches is fun.”
“Are you afraid to fly on 9/11?”
“No”
“Good”
They landed in Trinidad and
checked into a hotel. They were tired
from the flight so got some sleep. The
next day, Fanis went out to a sidewalk vendor and ordered doubles, which is
like a crepe except it’s not fully closed.
It’s open like a taco but the wrap isn’t corn but a thin doughy
layer. Inside has various spices and
East Indian herbs that Fanis couldn’t tell you what it was. He told the vendor, “I can’t handle spicy so
anything that’s spicy, don’t include”
“Yes sir” she said with a
chuckle.
Fanis knew that they assumed
this because he was white. Both Fanis
and Kera were Greek and spices aren’t found in Greek cuisine so they didn’t
grow up accustomed to it. Kera came up
from behind and voiced, “Oh don’t be a pussy.
A little spice won’t hurt you”
“Oh yea? You think you can handle it”
“Of course”
Fanis turned to the vendor, “One
double with everything”
The vendor made it and Fanis
gave it to Kera. He then asked, “By the
way, where’s the closest place I can get milk?”
Kera shook her head and
smiled. The vendor told Fanis and Kera
took one bite and her eyes got wide, “Holy shit!”
“Come on”
Fanis hurried to the car. Unfortunately the store was a couple minutes
drive away. Fanis pulled over and bought
milk. Kera tried drinking water seemingly unaware that doesn’t help with spicy
food. Fanis came back and tears were
streaming down Kera’s face. He handed
her the jug of milk and she ripped the cap off and guzzled it. Fanis laughed and commented, “East Indian
food. Very similar to Indian. Never tell an Indian you can handle
spicy. American spicy not Indian
spicy. You should know that living in
London.”
“Well, they at least know they’re
serving English people so ease up a little bit.
Damn, this is what they eat?”
“Yea, it burns my mouth just
watching them.”
“Seriously, that was no joke”
“I know, listen to me next
time.”
When they got back, the vendor
was smirking at them. Fanis laughed but
Kera gave her a dirty look and hurried inside.
Fanis walked up to the vendor and declared, “Live and learn right?”
“Yup, you Americans?”
“Yup, you Americans?”
“We are”
“Yea, Trinidad is the only
Caribbean island that isn’t in debt. You
guys are in debt. Is it true that the
income inequality is enormous there?”
“Not if you compare it to the
rest of the world. The problem with
Americans is they compare everything to utopia in order to try to make it seem
bad. In the Caribbean, the rich have
servants and they have servants. Haiti
is the worst”
“Yea, those northern islands are
bad but here in Trinidad it’s a little better.”
“Americans are getting richer
and the income inequality has narrowed in the last year.”
“Do the 1% still own most of the
wealth?”
“Also a myth. The share of the income held by the top 20%
has fallen by the largest amount in over a decade. There’s a thing called the Gini index that
measures this. A low number is good in
that there’s not much income inequality.
It’s from 0-1. The US’s Gini
index has plummeted over the past year.”
“That’s good. I hear that American capitalism leaves people
behind and makes them poorer”
“Well, like I said, the
disparity is getting smaller but if you want to talk about poverty. According to the Census, the poverty rate
decreased by a half a percent since 2017.
It’s at 11.8%, which is the lowest it’s been since 2007.”
“Right before the housing bubble
burst and the economy collapsed causing a recession”
“Yes”
“So, the news is right. American might be having a recession soon”
“One indicator says yes, the others
say no, so who really knows? I can just
tell you what’s happening now.”
“What about wages?”
“Between 2017 – 2018, the median
earning increased by 3.4%. There are 2.3
Million more full time working people.”
“Yea but the rich had the
biggest increase right?”
“if that were true than the
income disparity wouldn’t have gotten smaller.
In fact, the 20th – 40th percentile had the
largest gain in wages.”
“Oh, well that’s good for them”
“Ehh” Fanis said with a shrug
“What does that mean?”
“Income groups are meaningless
because the people in the group constantly changes. Rich become poor, poor become rich and
everywhere in between. People always
think it’s the same people. It’s like if
I told you that someone is hit by a car every eight seconds in New York. You then respond that that guy must be in
serious pain or the toughest dude in the world”
The vendor laughed, “Why does
the American news say that everything is so bad then?”
“They don’t want to say anything
nice about Trump. They have to spin
everything to the worst possible way to take things. When there’s nothing bad, they just lie. For instance, everything I told you was from
the census data. The only thing they
report on in the census data is that there are more people without health
insurance. The news will have you
believe that that means people are getting poorer and can’t afford it.”
“What’s the real reason?”
“Trump got rid of the individual
mandate so now people who don’t want it, don’t get it. I was one of the ones that dropped it as soon
as the individual mandate was revoked.”
“There’s that many people that
just refuse to go to doctors when they get sick or are that confident they
won’t?”
“I don’t think so. The other reason, actually this is probably
the main one, there are fewer Medicaid recipients now because once you make a
certain amount of money, you are no longer eligible for Medicaid”
“That would mean fewer people
being uninsured would be a good sign because people are richer”
“Yea, but you can’t know which
is true. Whether people can’t afford it,
are too overconfident they won’t get sick, too stubborn to go see a doctor and
admit they need one or they’ve moved up in the income bracket so don’t
qualify.”
“Yea, the media definitely
doesn’t paint that picture so clearly”
“Luckily you have me” he said
with a smile
The vendor smiled back, “Thanks
for the knowledge”
“Any time” Fanis said as he
walked toward the hotel. When he got in,
Kera stated, “Were you two making fun of me this whole time?”
“No, we never even mentioned
you. We were talking economics”
“A street vendor cares about
economics” Kera inquired skeptically
“Apparently” Fanis replied
looking down knowing that he was saying something Kera didn’t believe but
happened to be the truth.
“Anyway, tomorrow is my meeting”
“Okay”
Kera and Fanis took a cab to the
meeting place. Fanis was looking out the
window and remarked, “Holy shit! There’s a ton of KFC’s here”
The driver responded, “Oh yes,
fried chicken very good here. You want
to go?”
Kera and Fanis looked at each
other. Kera spoke up, “No thank you, we
need to get to a meeting.”
“Alright, maybe after. I can come get you if you like. What time will you be finished?”
“I don’t know” came Kera’s
reply
Kera and Fanis arrived at the
meeting and went inside. As always,
Fanis hung in the back by the door with the security personnel of the
buyer. Before Fanis got into this, he would’ve
thought that body guards and security of two opposing people would be sizing
each other up and be very confrontational.
Instead, he found himself socializing with them in order to pass the
time. They were all on high alert but
could multitask when it seemed like there wasn’t going to be disagreements. One of the buyer’s security extended his
hand, “I’m David”
Fanis shook it, “Fanis”
“You Americans are lucky that
you have such a high minimum wage in America”
“It’s only in some states. The states that don’t have it, though, are
the lucky ones”
“Why’s that?”
“Unions are fighting
self-checkout counters now.”
“What are those?”
“When you go to a store or a
fast food restaurant instead of talking to a real person, you ring up the
groceries yourself and pay a computer.
There’s someone watching in case you mess up or, more likely, so that
you don’t steal anything. Most
convenient stores have like four of them.
For big department stores, like target, there’s a bunch of them. Even fast food, like KFC, you go to a kiosk
and type in what you want and then pick it up at the counter.”
“Ah, you Americans love high
tech”
“Not really, it’s that they
can’t afford to pay all their employees minimum wage. The computer is cheaper than a real person so
they go with the computer. That’s why
unions are fighting to limit the amount of self-checkout kiosks a place can
have.”
“Alright, so the greedy store
owners can’t use the loophole anymore and start hiring people again.”
“That’s not how economics works. People get paid based on the value they generate. If you don’t generate more than what they’re paying you, they’re not going to pay you. You’ll be fired.”
“That’s not how economics works. People get paid based on the value they generate. If you don’t generate more than what they’re paying you, they’re not going to pay you. You’ll be fired.”
“But if they limit the self
check-out, then what option do they have?”
“Close shop. Nobody wants to operate at a loss”
“Oh, right, that is bad. So you think minimum wage is a bad thing”
“I know it is.”
“Interesting”
The meeting ended and Fanis said
good bye to David and left with Kera.
Kera queried, “What do you want to do now?”
“We should take it easy but then
go to Maracas tomorrow”
“What’s Maracas?”
“A beautiful beach they have
here. The water is clean even for the
Caribbean. Absolutely gorgeous with
clear sand.”
“Sounds good to me.”
The next day, they go to
Maracas. As it was hurricane season, the
waves were big and not too many people were at the beach. Fanis and Kera rented lounge chairs and sat
on the beach ignoring the wind. Every
now and then, Fanis went into the water and Kera sometimes joined him. As afternoon approached, Fanis uttered, “I’m
going to get us some food” as he walked off
“Okay, aren’t you going to ask
what I want?” Kera yelled after him
“No, this is Maracas, you need
to try Bake N Shark”
Kera rejoined, “They serve bacon
with shark”
“No, just try it, it’s good”
“What the hell? I’ll give it a shot” she voiced nonchalantly.
Fanis got two Bake N Sharks and
came back. As he did, he saw a guy
talking to Kera. He rolled his
eyes. He should have known better than to
leave an attractive girl alone on the beach.
He approached and declared loudly, “Hey Kera, I got lunch”
The guy took the hint and backed
up a little bit. Kera took the food and
gave him a look that made him know that she was glad he was back. To Fanis’ surprise, the guy didn’t leave. Instead, he commented, “You guys Democratic
socialists?”
Kera beamed and Fanis blurted
out, “Nope”
“What? You don’t like Elizabeth Warren? She’s a smart cookie. That accountable capitalism seems like a good
idea”
“That is absolutely retarded and
will destroy savings accounts and the American economy”
“Shit man, tell me how you
really feel. It only affects the rich
people”
“No, it doesn’t. Most of the money is in the middle class
simply because there are more of them than anyone else. There aren’t many billionaires”
“But the billionaires own all
the stock”
“Also wrong, people over 55 own
73% of the value of domestically owned stocks”
“That’s pretty big. How do you figure?”
“In America, people get pensions
and 401 (k) plans and IRA’s. There are
various retirement savings accounts linked to stocks and bonds. Since most people working have one of these,
the combined value is very high.”
“So where does Warren fit in?”
“She wants to destroy it, which
would destroy everyone’s retirement fund.”
“Is that what she said? She wants to destroy it?”
“Pretty much. She’s worth like 17 Million dollars or
something. She’s one the wealthiest
politicians. She wants to punish
corporations that make more money than her so she wants companies accountable
to the stake holders rather than stock holders.
She’s not stupid, she knows this will bankrupt the economy but in so
doing, it will make government richer.
Since she is going to be the head of the government, she gets richer.”
“Aren’t stake holders and stock
holders the same thing?”
“Now, yes, but under Warren’s
plan, the stake holders will be government organizations. The institutions that get the money will be
decided by a government entity that she is going to make up. It will probably be mostly environmental
groups. This is in addition to all the
taxes she wants to impose. Then, after
the organizations the government agency forces them to give to, the retirees
and stock holders get the scraps”
“This is why you can’t have
bitches in charge”
Kera had a tattoo of the woman’s
symbol on her thigh so Fanis knew that this was said to inflame Kera. Kera screamed, “Hey!” but Fanis put a hand
out saying he’d handle this.
Fanis retorted, “No, just that
bitch Warren. Women are quite capable
but no liberal or socialist, man or woman, should ever be in charge. I know you’re trying to be an asshole but it
takes a lot to offend me.”
“Really? How about this. I’m going to make your girl there my
bitch. I love fucking feminist American
mother cunts.”
“You’re going to have to get
through me first kid”
“With pleasure, Americans are
pussies.”
With that, the man threw a
punch, which Fanis easily dodged. Kera
scurried to her feet and was already packing up her things to run away. As the man turned from his momentum, Fanis
punched him in the kidneys. To Fanis’
surprise, the man darted his leg back and connected with his sternum. Fanis grabbed his chest and backed up. This was a mistake because the man landed a
blow across his face staggering him.
Fanis hurried forward and drove his shoulder into the guys’ midsection
and tackled him to the ground. He mounted
him and punched down but the man moved his head and Fanis pounded the sand. The man squirmed out from underneath him and
faced Fanis on guard. Kera had already
made it up the beach and was trying to get a cab. It was off season, so there weren’t many so
she was talking to the vendors to try to find one. The man faked with a left and Fanis brought
his left arm to head grabbing the back of his head as his right hand was cocked
in a fist by his chin. He was preparing
for what came next as the man came hard with his right but it grazed off Fanis’
elbow and missed his head completely.
Fanis wrapped his left arm around the man’s right and gripped under his
arm pit. Seeing as the man didn’t react
by trying the left, Fanis used his left hand to jam his palm repeatedly into
the man’s solar plexus. He then stuck
out his left leg behind the man’s legs and grabbed him by the throat with his
left hand. He forced his hand back and
the man tripped over Fanis’ leg but didn’t go down because Fanis held him by
the neck. The man was bent back
struggling for air not just from being choked but in the position he was in, he
was being asphyxiated. The man
instinctively grabbed Fanis’ left wrist with both hands but he didn’t have the
leverage to force Fanis’ hand off it.
All this did was expose his stomach and Fanis took his right and pounded
down on it. It didn’t take many blows
for the man to stop struggling as he had no energy left. At this point, Fanis simply let go with his
left and the man collapsed onto the sand writhing in pain and grabbing his
neck. He took deep breaths trying to regain
it as Fanis gathered his things. Their
time at Maracas was done
Fanis joined Kera in the parking
lot and she casually remarked, “The cab is on its way, should be her in like
five minutes”
“Nice”
They took the cab back to the
hotel not mentioning anything about the guy on the beach. Fanis was a little sore from the blows he
sustained but otherwise okay. They both
knew that the Caribbean didn’t have the same respect for women that America
has. The next day, they were back on the
plane heading back to London. Fanis
cried out, “Yes, John Bolton was fired”
“I hear he resigned” said Kera
“Doesn’t matter, he’s out. It’s always confusing on which one it
is. If you try to fire someone they yell
back, ‘you didn’t fire me, I quit’ or someone tries to resign and you get
pissed so you fire them. Bottom line is,
he’s gone”
“What do you have against
Bolton?”
“He’s of the Bush mentality that
American needs to police the world.
Trump is America first and doesn’t believe we should constantly be
fighting other people’s battles”
“You supported Bush”
“I did in Iraq because we caused
the problem. It was his father that
armed Saddam Hussein with chemical weapons that he used on his own people and
the Kurds. Bush Jr had to clean up his
father’s mess. That’s why I’m very
consistent on this. George H.W., who
Bolton worked for, was wrong to arm Saddam.
That was America meddling when it shouldn’t be. George W had to fix the problem. That’s why I’m okay with George W but not
with HW”
“Well, I’m against both. I wonder what was the straw the broke the
camel’s back. Those two ideological
differences were always true.”
“Oh, Bolton didn’t like that
Trump cancelled a meeting with the Taliban.
He thinks we should negotiate with them.”
“The embassy was bombed in
Afghanistan today.”
“See, you can’t reason with
terrorists”
“Isn’t it American policy not to negotiate with
terrorists?”
“That’s what they say; it’s not
what they do. Well, the Bolton types”
“Trump should have never even
entertained the meeting. There shouldn’t
have even been a meeting to cancel”
“That I agree with.”
“You actually criticized Trump”
she yelled out surprisingly
“Yes, I do when he’s wrong. He’s just not wrong often.”
“So you say” she stated
sardonically.
They arrived in London and went
back to their flat. Fanis realized that
he never asked Kera if the deal was successful.
In the end, he realized that he didn’t actually care. Kera did her job and he did his. Other than that, there was no reason to
inquire about things he didn’t even try to understand.
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