Theo the Trump Employee Episode 42 Combating Evil

                At the White House, Theo is at work looking forward to the New Year.  Deep down, he knows that there really is no difference between the end of December and the beginning of January.  The arbitrary counting of another year and a mark of the end of the holiday season is, objectively, but another day.  With that said, it’s hard not to get caught up with everyone else in reflecting how the last year had gone and look to the middle of the week not being like any other Wednesday, but a blank slate and a restart.  There is a hope to the New Year and Theo finds himself still counting down the days when December is but a memory. 

                December, however, is not going down uneventfully.  Near Fort Worth, Texas someone walked in with a shotgun and, while getting communion, fired on one of the parishioners and attempted to kill the pastor.  A man named Jack Wilson acted quickly and drew his weapon shooting the gunman in the head from about 25 ft with one shot.  This is how they deal with bad people with guns in Texas but unfortunately, two innocent people were killed in the six seconds it took to react and neutralize the threat. 

                This topic came up and another staffer blurted out, “Don’t mess with Texas.”

                Theo rolled his eyes, “I don’t think it’s really a good time to make jokes but I will agree with you that the asshole picked the wrong state to try that shit.”

                “You know what I mean though.”

                “I think I just told you what you meant.”

                “Right, but like think about it; in six seconds that piece of shit killed two people.  How do liberals argue that guns are bad?  Nobody can call 911 and have the cops respond, show up and take out the gunman in six seconds.  Who knows how many people he would have killed if Jack wasn’t there.”

                “You say it like you know him.”

                “Well, ‘Jack Wilson’ is pretty easy to remember.  I’m just saying he’s a Patriot and I wish we had more of him in America.”

                “I completely agree with everything you said.”

                “I just don’t understand the opposition.”

                “I’ll take it a step further.  Everyone that doesn’t think the answer to thwart a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun, is putting your life in danger.”

                “Don’t sugar coat it; they want you to die in the highly unlikely event you’re in that situation.”

                A female staffer rolled her eyes, “Look, it’s not enough to have a gun.”

                Theo asked, “What’s your solution?”

                “If you’re going to carry the weapon, you best know how to use it.”

                “Oh, right.  That’s obvious.”

                “No, it’s not.  People take it for granted.  They think it’s enough just to have it because it’s a deterrent.  That’s all well and good but you need to be prepared when the deterrent fails.”

                “To be honest, I know people use it that way, but I’ve always been of the opinion that you shouldn’t let someone know you have a weapon until after you attack them with it.  People that just flash their shirt up to reveal they’re packing and then put their shirt down does nothing.  It takes time to draw the weapon and shoot and when your opponent knows you have it, then you are at more of a disadvantage.”

                “If that gunman walked into that church and everyone in the pews had holsters over their shirts plainly revealing that they were carrying, he probably would have walked out and found another church.”

                “Sometimes your training hinders you though.  Jack Wilson, for instance, I don’t know if he was law enforcement or not but I don’t think he was because he went right for the head.  Law enforcement is trained to hit center mass.”

                “That’s because, contrary to popular belief, cops don’t shoot to kill, which is why they go for big targets.”

                “Never made sense to me because I always believed in ‘aim small; miss small.”

                “Well, when the police are engaged in a firefight, they do a pretty good job so they’re doing something right.”

                “I’ll give you that.”

                That ended the conversation and they went back to work.  After work, Theo went to a bar near American University to see what college kids were saying about current events.  He enjoyed trolling them as they pretended to know everything but usually would just get angry when you made them feel stupid.  He walked into the bar and ordered a drink eavesdropping.  On the way there, he thought back to a George Carlin episode stand up he saw many years ago.  He was making jokes about school shootings and Carlin exclaimed that he couldn’t wait for there to be a church shooting.  He then announced, ‘it’ll happen, just you watch.’  It had happened a lot in the past couple years and Theo often wondered how Carlin knew all those years ago that that was where America was headed.  The only thing Carlin got wrong is that the media would call him a ‘disgruntled worshipper’ as Theo hadn’t heard that term used yet.  Oddly the vulgar comic gave Theo sanity in knowing that the media was wrong about it being because of Donald Trump because Carlin had no idea that Donald Trump would be president.  The stand up Theo had heard was during Bill Clinton’s administration.  Perhaps that was why Carlin didn’t predict the blame would be put on the president; a Democrat was in the White House so the media wasn’t blaming the president for all problems anywhere in the United States.

                Theo heard what he was waiting for.  A boy declaring, “How could you shoot up a church?”

                Theo smiled and turned to him, “It’s simple. Most people nowadays ridicule religious people and they are mocked in Hollywood and the media.  The liberals have created a godless society so therefore nobody views church as a solemn place anymore.  Once the mystique is lifted, then you can look at the church for what it is, a perfect place for a mass shooting.”

                “Why?  Because religious people turn the other cheek?  Tell that to the guy in Texas that was shot dead in six seconds by one of these people going to a building to hear someone preach about forgiveness.”

                “That is not what I meant but given how you’re mocking religious people and implying they’re hypocrites, you’re proving my point.  It’s because society has inculcated into people’s minds exactly what you said that helps.  Even when we’re at war in Muslim countries, when they stop to pray five times a day, we don’t take advantage of their being vulnerable and gun them down.  We wait for them to finish praying and then we try to kill them again.  You could argue that our doing that enhances their belief in Allah and make their resolve for Jihad stronger and prolong the war but our troops are fighting for what the Constitution stands for so they’re not going to be hypocrites by denying the very first amendment of anyone.  If only our citizens felt as strongly about our second amendment as they do our first.”

                “You’re saying that people shoot at churches because TV and media mock religion.”

                “No, I am not saying that.  That is the first step.  The next step is realizing how a church is the most vulnerable place to hit because everyone’s attention is toward the front of the church but the entrance is in the back.  When you enter a church, everyone has their back to you and, contrary to what parents claim everywhere, they don’t have eyes in the back of their head.  Since nobody can see you, you can draw a weapon and fire without being noticed more easily than anywhere else you may be.”

                “Oh, yea, that makes sense but what can you do?”

                “Have security and volunteer law enforcement stand facing the door.”

                “Then they can’t worship”

                “Yes they can. The law enforcement doesn’t have to be a member of the church or even the religion.  Have Christians guard synagogues since the Sabbath is on Saturday and have Jews guard churches since Sunday is not their holy day.”

                “People want to feel safe in church.”

                “Which is why you need guards.”

                “No, they want it so that the guards aren’t needed in the first place.”

                “Given all the shootings at churches lately, that is no longer an option.  Since it has happened and this isn’t the first time, people will probably feel safer with a guard than without.”

                “I don’t believe that.  We need to take guns out of people’s hands.”

                “What else do you think will work against a firearm besides a firearm?”

                “If guns were illegal, then nobody would have guns.”

                “Do people get heroin?”

                “Well yea, but that’s different.”

                “No, it’s not.  You’re trying to tell me that someone has no problem breaking the law against murdering someone but they’re going to think twice about breaking the possession law?”

                “Alright, I just don’t like guns.”

                “Fine, but why should everyone be punished because of your preferences?  I ask you again, what else do you think works against a firearm than a firearm?”

                “Some principles have suggested having a bucket of rocks.”

                “And you think that’s more effective?”

                “Yea, because one person with a rock isn’t dangerous but the only thing that’s going to make a bucket of rocks dangerous is if a large group is throwing rocks and that would only happen with an obvious threat like a gunman.”

                “Somebody is shooting bullets and you expect a lot of people to stand, pick a rock out of a bucket, step and throw.  Like you said, you need a coordinated effort.  Somehow everyone has good aim and they’re not going to accidentally hit someone else with the rock.  You basically want to stone someone to death, which is considered barbaric even as a death penalty technique.”

                “It would work.”

                “How long do you think it’d take?”

                “I don’t know”

                “Six seconds?”

                “No, probably not”

                “That’s how long it took one guy with a gun to neutralize the threat in Texas.  Two innocent people died anyway.  How many innocents would die your way?”

                “You asked for an alternative, I gave you one.”

                “You’re alternative is contingent on multiple people not afraid of someone spraying bullets at them and facing the fire.  Most people run when there’s a gunman and, like you insinuated, the less people throwing rocks, the less effective it is.”

                “Look man, I don’t know.  You’re a gun toting redneck, and that’s fine.”

                “I’m from Ohio and I’m not very proficient with a firearm.  Given that current status of the liberals I feel like I should learn but right now I am not.”

                “Oh well whatever”

                “You’re like Joe Biden who attacked Republican governor of Texas Gregg Abbott for saying that people should bring guns to church.  Biden called it irrational.”

                “It is! That’s what I was saying before.”

                “If Jack Wilson listened to Biden, more people would have died.”

                “You can’t know that for sure.  It was a shotgun; those things don’t have too many bullets”

                “The bullets spray.  They’re shells that disperse in the air.  You don’t think that’s a problem when firing into a crowd of people?”

                “They could have bum rushed him.”

                “In the time it took Jack Wilson to take him out, nobody had made any effort to bum rush him.  Again, the longer it goes on, the more likelihood that more people would have died.”

                A girl walked up to them and opined, “Dude, you’re in the wrong place to be talking like this.  You want to talk about governors being harassed?   Just a stone’s throw, pun intended, from here is Virginia where their governor Ralph Northum has ordered guns to be confiscated.”

                “I’m aware of the Democrat that legalized infanticide and either wore black face or a KKK costume.  He is a good example of how racist the Democrat party is.  As to his little gun ban, Virginia mayors have declared their counties ‘gun sanctuary’ counties and have decided to openly defy Governor Northum’s orders.”

                “In the south maybe.”

                “No, 87 counties and I think there’s only like 95 counties in the entire state.”

                “They have no legal authority to do that.”

                “If cities can be illegal immigrant sanctuaries than they can be gun sanctuaries too.  There’s actually an amendment to the constitution for the guns but none for illegal immigrants.”

                “Well they’re breaking the….I mean….”

                “What are you going to do if you’re Northum?”

                “He already put up billboards saying that if they don’t do it by a certain date, he’s going to order the cops to go house by house and force them.”

                “And 87 mayors, who are the heads of their police force, have said they won’t follow that order.  The National Guard has also said they won’t follow that order.  Even if they did, you know how bad it’s going to look when uniformed police are breaking into people’s houses rounding them up to go to jail?  The whole country will be horrified. “

                “He already increased the budget for prisons to allow for this.  You’re just afraid he’s going to do it.”

                “I live in Maryland so I don’t care.  I kind of hope he does, because it’ll be a massive clusterfuck and it would probably turn Virginia red in the 2020 elections.  People don’t look too kindly when the government invades their home to steal shit from them.  You liberals forget that consent of the government matters.  Northum doesn’t have the consent of the governed and Revolutionary wars have been fought based on that concept.”

                “It’s not that many people.”

                “87 Counties”

                The girl pulled out her phone and spoke into the microphones, “How many counties are there in Virigina?”

                The phone spoke back, “Virginia is divided into 95 counties.”

                The girl frowned, “Only eight counties haven’t openly defied the governor.” Theo stated

                The girl put her head down and blushed.  Her mouth widened and the boy gave her a wry look.  Theo’s eyes darted in between them with a smug smile on his face daring them to say something.  Instead, they turned around and walked away. 

                The previous students he was talking to were White.  A Hispanic student came up to him and articulated, “You seem to like law enforcement.”

                “I do believe they keep us safe, yes.”

                “Then you gotta hate this Durham investigation into the CIA and the FBI.”

                “Oh no, if you abuse your power, you deserve to be punished.”

                “See, you’re contradicting yourself.  First, law enforcement is a great thing to keep us safe, now you don’t like them when they attack your boy Trump.”

                “I didn’t say law enforcement.  I said people need to carry guns.  The insinuation was it takes too much time for law enforcement to get there and every second matters.  The whole point of conservatism is you can’t rely on the government to solve your problems.”

                “I don’t know.  Haspel’s pissed because she can’t do her job.”

                “You listen to Natasha Bertrand of Politico too much.”

                “Yea, she doesn’t pull any punches.”

                “She’s one of the only retards still promoting the Russian collusion hoax.”

                “You calling her that because she’s a woman?”

                “No, there are definitely more male Russian collusion hoaxers than female and everyone that believes President Trump colluded with the Russians at this point is a retard.”     

                “We’re not talking about Russian collusion; we’re talking about undermining the CIA.”

                “CIA director Haspel, I’ll give you credit for knowing who replaced Brennan by the way, has not said anything of the sort.”

                “She can’t because Trump would fire her.”

                “Hasn’t stopped other people.”

                “They got fired.”

                “A lot of them did but not all of them.  Most talked shit after getting fired.  Usually, people would realize that it doesn’t make them credible but not in this case.”

                “The CIA is just doing their job.  Questioning them hurts national security so they will be more hesitant to do their job in the future.”

                “Do you think we should prosecute cops that shoot people because that undermines them as well?  Unlike you, there’s actually data to back it up.  Crime was falling before Ferguson but after, crime rose because cops are hesitant to use lethal force or get involved so the criminals run wild with less fear of prosecution.”

                “That’s fucked up man.  Cops are racist; they just gun down people like me.”

                “Cops kill twice as many white people than black people so they actually are more likely to shoot people like me.”

                “That can’t be true.”

                “Look it up. The media just doesn’t give a shit when it’s a white person.  That’s why cops don’t hesitate, isn’t that your point?”

                “There are more white people.”

                “Not twice as many as minorities.  Look at prisons, they’re predominantly minorities.”

                “We got off topic; we’re talking about the CIA.”

                “Nobody is beyond scrutiny.  Everyone needs to be watched and that includes the CIA.  It doesn’t undermine shit.  I hope that Haspel and every CIA and FBI agent thinks twice before using an unverified hoax document to invasively spy on American citizens and distract a country for three years investigating something they’ve known all along is bullshit just to cover their asses.  I hope they all get made an example of and everyone involved is jailed so that the current members do think twice.  Despite twice as many white people getting shot than blacks, I have no fear of the police because I believe that almost everyone shot by cops deserved it.”

                “Why do you think Bertrand made her comment then?”

                “To threaten Durham.  At least I hope so because the alternative that she doesn’t think it’s newsworthy or wrong that a CIA director advised the President and acted upon a hoax document and then swore to its authenticity without doing anything to check if it was true.”

                “It was the FBI’s job to check if it was true.”

                “Then he should have told the gang of 8 on Capitol Hill and the President during the briefing that it wasn’t verified yet.  He probably shouldn’t have included it at all until after the FBI verified it.  Don’t you think it’s a bad idea to act on information that you’re not sure is true yet?”

                “There had to be some reason he acted on it.”

                “Yea, he hates the president.  Devin Nunes, who is part of the Gang of 8, has informed us all that no official intelligence was used to open the case against Trump.  Why isn’t your girl Bertrand interested in that?”

                “Well, the investigation wasn’t started because of the dossier; it was started because Papadopoulos talked to Joseph MIfsud and found out that the Russians had thousands of e-mails on Hillary.”

                “Actually, it was when Papadopoulos talked to Downer about the meeting with Mifsud and Downer denies they talked about e-mails but it was about dirt on Hillary.  All this is null and void because Mifsud isn’t a Russian agent.”

                He clapped his hands and grinned as he exclaimed, “Bertrand talked about that too.  MIfsud was not a CIA employee so that Republican talking point is bullshit.”

                “Nobody said he worked for the CIA” Theo snapped back then continued, “Republicans said he’s not a Russian asset.  I don’t work for the CIA; I’m not a Russian asset.  You’re not one or the other.  She’s making up shit that Republicans said in order to cover for the fact that she got this so wrong.  Think about it, if Mifsud is not a Russian asset and the investigation into whether President Trump colluded with the Russians was started because Papadopoulos talked to Mifsud, then how is it Russian collusion?”

                “You lost me”

                “In order to collude with Russians, you have to be talking to a Russian.  If Mifsud isn’t Russian than Papadopoulos was not talking to a Russian and the entire case collapses.  Steele, on the other hand, named two Russian sources for his dossier; Trubnikov and Surkov.  I can give you the names of the Russians he colluded with.  Tell me the name of the Russian that Trump or his campaign colluded with?”

                “Putin”

                “No evidence of that.”

                “Ok, so you talk for the Republicans.  Who do you think Mifsud is?”

                “He’s tied to western intelligence assets.  Given that he’s from Malta and Malta is right by Italy, he’s probably Italian intelligence.  He does spend a lot of time in London though so maybe he’s linked to British intelligence.  British intelligence makes more sense since so much of this scandal emanated from England so, I am a betting man, I’d put my money on Jolly Good England.  Either way though, it’s not Russia.”

                “You always have a response to everything I say.”

                “You have to stop thinking you won before I respond.”

                “Back to Bertrand, why do you think she’s doing this again?”

                “The media is threatening Durham that if he doesn’t do what they wants, they will drag his name through the mud and attack him personally and accuse him of being a traitor or worse.”

                “Oh, that’s a little conspiratorial.”

                “Wait till spring.   In a couple months, you’ll forget this conversation ever happened and you’ll be spouting that line because your little hero Bertrand said so.  Get ready; she’ll do it.”

                “Alright, we’ll see.  Just so you know, you’re old as fuck.  You do know this is a college bar right?  I’m going to go hang out with people my own age.”

                Theo was 35 so he was old for a college bar but he didn’t care.  He smiled and watched as the student walked away.  This is why he was here and he was enjoying it.  It didn’t take long for someone else to take up the challenge.  This time it was a Hispanic student, “Hi, I’m Cindy”

                “I’m Theo” realizing this was the first opponent that had the decency to introduce themselves.  In the other’s defense though, Theo didn’t introduce himself either.

                “I’m curious who else do you think is a retard?”

                “Chuck Todd, Brian Stelter, Adam Schiff, Jerry Nadler…”

                “I get the point” she interrupted

                “Alright”

                “I like Chuck Todd.”

                “Really?  The dude even looks evil.”

                “After growing up with Catholic guilt, it’s a little refreshing hearing him stand up against religious people.”

                “Are they attacking him?”

                “Well……no but….”

                “You don’t think it’s in poor taste to attack religious people at the most religious time of the year?”

                “No, I think it’s courageous.”

                “Courageous to attack someone that is merely exercising their freedom of religion?  If I mocked Muslims on a rug bowing five times a day, would you call that ‘courageous.’?”

                “No, that’s racist and xenophobic.”        

                “You see no hypocrisy in those two statements?”

                “Maybe he was overly harsh.  He’s just saying that people like religion because people like being lied to.  We may grow up, but we’re still little kids inside.  Little kids love fairy talks, which are lies.  That’s what draws them to religion.  It’s channeling their inner child.”

                “Well, obviously people like being lied to because they watch Chuck Todd.”

                “No, that’s not what he meant!” she shouted

                “He has been claiming that President Trump colluded with the Russians was true and that was a lie.  He then said that Spygate was a hoax, when it was proven true by the IG.  He got the two biggest scandals in our nation’s history wrong.  He undermined a duly elected president with his lies and he won’t even admit it.  He just doubles down in his lying and attacks religious people on a day in which  there was a church shooting.  He’s a despicable human being.”

                “He was saying that religious people like Trump because they believe in things like Noah’s Ark and other fairy tales and Trump lies to them.”

                “What significant thing did Trump lie about?  Name one lie that had negative ramifications.”

                “He’d build the wall.”

                “He was stopped several times and still got a lot of it done and he’s still fighting people in court.”

                “He lied a lot.”

                “I’m listening.  The wall I don’t even count because he’s not a totalitarian.  People have used checks and balances, abused them if you ask me, to try to thwart him at every turn on that one.”

                “I don’t know google it.”

                “I have.  It just comes up with exaggerations like more people went to his inauguration than any other president.  That was wrong but there aren’t many negative ramifications, or any ramifications from that. Would you agree?”

                “I’m not talking about that shit.”

                “Then what are you talking about?”

                “There shouldn’t be any religion.”

                “This is what you liberals don’t understand.  Conservatives take the Bill of Rights very seriously.  We are not asking you for permission for our big “R” rights given to us by something higher than humans; I won’t say ‘God’ because that triggers you.  If government gives you rights, they can take them away.  We agree with our founders in that they’re inalienable and no government official can take them from us.  We will fight to the core to protect them which is what Northum is finding out in Virginia.  We will not be oppressed and if we choose to practice our religion then we are going to whether you like it or not.  You are free not to go to church and to practice your religion of liberalism, and trust me, it is a religion, but we aren’t asking you a goddamn thing.”

                “You’re a Christian and you used the Lord’s name in vain”

                “Yes, I’m not very devout and I don’t think my speech is going to be an issue on Judgment Day.  If it is, well then I lived a pretty good life.”

                The girl laughed, “Yea, I would agree with that.”

                “Your religious leaders, like Chuck Todd, attack religion because every big government person needs to because when religion is extinct, there is no other source for rights besides the government.  That is why they mock religious people.”

                “You’ve given me a lot to think about.”

                “Since you didn’t run away like everyone else, let me buy you a drink.”

                “I’d like that.”

                Theo ordered her a drink and then closed his tab.  Cindy remarked, “You’re leaving?”

                “Yea, I got to get home, I have work tomorrow.”

                “I have class tomorrow and I’m still out.”

                “When you reach my age, your body doesn’t recover as quickly.”

                “Shame, well see you around.”

                “See you”

                They hugged and Theo left.  He would need to take two trains to get back to his home in Rockville, Maryland.  While on the train, he heard people conversing about an incident in New York where five people were attacked with a machete at a Rabbi’s house.  Theo was still in the mood to fight so announced, “And the media refused to call it an Anti-Semitic attack.”

                There was a slight pause but when they saw the confrontational look Theo had, one finally responded, “You don’t know his intentions.”

                “If the guy with the machete was white and the victims were black, would you have said the same thing?”

                “Well….I don’t know”

                Theo always wondered why people don’t just lie.  The people he was speaking with were white and ‘white man guilt’ was strong.  Anything that could possibly be construed as racist they were tentative to say.  Even if it meant completely contradicting themselves and being a hypocrite like in this case.  It was a group of three and a second one opined, “Well, DeBlasio blamed Donald Trump because his harsh tone breeds violence.”

                “Do you think before you speak?”

                The guy’s eyes widened and he gasped, “Umm, yea I do.”

                “I don’t think so!  President Trump has been the most actively pro-Israel president in American history.  His granddaughter is Jewish.  His daughter-in-law is Jewish.  He moved the US embassy to Jerusalem.  Israel sings his praises.  Yet, you ignore all that because the socialist mayor of New York uses the word ‘Atmosphere of hate’ which is a nonsense term.”

                The only one that hadn’t spoke takes out his phone, “It’s not just us. Even the Washington Post says it.  Look at the tweet.”

                Theo takes the phone and sees a tweet from the Washington Post saying ‘Some Democrats urge Trump to more strongly condemn Anti-Semitism after Muncy attacks.’  He grins and goes to the WAPO feed and filters to two weeks ago and hands it back and challenges, “Now read this one.”

                Hesitantly, the guy takes back the phone and looks down at a tweet from the same Washington Post twitter feed articulating, ‘Perspective: Why President Trump’s executive order to fight Anti-Semitism is dangerous for Jews.’  He shakes his head, “What’s your point?  Two weeks ago they said the order was dangerous for Jews and a Jew got attacked.”

                “When he does something to condemn Anti-Semitism, they accuse him of being too harsh and being an Anti-Semite.  Then when he hadn’t done something in two weeks regarding Anti-Semitism they complain he should do more.  That’s damned if you do, damned if you don’t.  That is why we call it ‘fake news.’  It is also why I’m continually baffled at the ignorance of the American public to not pick up on it.  We’re talking two weeks.  You obviously care enough to discuss what WAPO says.  You don’t remember two weeks ago babbling on with probably these same parrots you’re with now talking about that he shouldn’t be making executive orders about Anti-Semitism and now you’re saying he should openly condemn it again?”

                “Wow, bitter a little bit?”

                “Remember, it was the Democrats that voted down a bill on Anti-Semitism after Rasheeda Tlib and Ilhan Omar attacked the Jews incessantly.”

                “We don’t like talking to people who generalize and are hateful.”

                “Then you should stop speaking to each other because you hate Jews and conservatives.”

                “Well you hate liberals”

                “I never claimed I don’t talk to people who are hateful.  You did.”

                The train arrived at the station Theo needed to transfer and he does.  On the final train he needs to get home, he sees a man around his age and a black girl that looks pretty young.  As if she could read his thoughts, she was confronting the man, “I may be 15 but I’m smart.  I’m informed, ask me something.”

                “Who do you want to win the Democrat primaries?”

                “Joe Biden because socialists will bankrupt this country and it’s never the answer so Bernie and Warren are out and everyone else doesn’t really have a chance so they don’t matter.”

                “Biden might have to testify in the impeachment trial.”

                “Traditionally, there are no witnesses in the Senate trial after a president is impeached.  Pelosi is just making up the rules as she goes along.  Don’t get me wrong, I obviously hate Trump but at least follow procedure.  If you didn’t want the Senate to have a trial, you shouldn’t have impeached him in the first place.”

                “Wow, you are smart.  That’s probably why Biden said he would ignore the subpoena if he got one to testify.”

                “Yea, it’s not illegal for him to refuse so it’s within his rights to refuse the subpoena regardless if the Senate trial has witnesses or not.”

                “I’m really impressed.  You are very mature.”

                “I told you.”

                “I’d invite you over but I live alone and people might talk.”

                “My parents are gone, there’s nobody that’s going to hunt you down or anything.  I live with my sister.”

                “I don’t think she would be too happy.”

                “She wouldn’t be but fuck her.  I need an internship and you got connections.”

                “I do, and you have impressed me.  You just have to make sure that you don’t tell anyone because the optics are really bad.”

                “I won’t, I swear.  It’ll be our little secret.”

                Theo called out, “Says every sexual predator ever!”

                The teenager gives him a dirty look and snaps back, “Mind your fucking business.”

                “No, I don’t think I will.  Guys can tell when other guys are predators and that dude” pointing to that man, “wants to fuck you.”

                “I would never allow that to happen.”

                “You’re going to be in his house.  He is at least twice the size of you.  If he wanted to force you, he could but he may not even do that.  He may just slip something in your drink.”

                “Okay dad, I think I can take care of myself, I’m nearly 16.  You’re just jealous because you want to fuck me.”

                “First off, adults never say what age they’re near.  That’s a kid thing” he put on a high pitched tone and mocked, “I’m six and half.”  He then switched back to his normal voice; “do you think I go around saying ‘I’m 35 and half.’?  “Secondly, you showed him how smart and mature you were by talking about Biden.  Riddle me this little girl, what was President Trump impeached for?”

                “Abuse of power by threatening Ukraine.”

                “And….”

                “Obstruction of congress.”

                “How did he obstruct congress?”

                “By enacting Executive privilege to….”  Her eyes opened wider as her voice got softer.

                “You’re trailing off there kid.  First of all, he’s not officially impeached until Pelosi hands the articles over to the Senate so the entire premise of this conversation is inaccurate since he wasn’t impeached yet.  But go on, you were speaking so forcefully before, how did he obstruct congress?”

                “Invoking executive privilege to not testify after he was subpoenaed.”

                “Biden also said it was illegal to subpoena him.  Tell me something mature beyond her years woman, how does the president not get executive privilege but Joe Biden does?”

                “He was VicePres…i…dent.” Again she trailed off

                “’was’ being the operative word.  The Vice President doesn’t get executive privilege only the President does.  You’re going to sit there and with a straight face tell me that the current President doesn’t get executive privilege but the former Vice President does?”

                “Executive Privilege doesn’t get you out of everything.  Nobody is above the law.”

                “I agree, that’s why you need a court ruling to see if the executive privilege is valid.  That’s how our checks and balances work but don’t you think you should wait for a court to make a ruling before you impeach him for something that hasn’t been established as illegal yet?”

                “The Democrats didn’t want to wait.”

                “They do now.  They just wanted to declare ‘impeachment’ but then obstruct the process.”

                The teenager looked around and thought of what to say but nothing was coming.  She timidly rejoined, “I guess, I didn’t look at all the angles of this.”

                “Yea, but he said you’re real smart right?  Do yourself a favor, if you don’t listen to me and go to his house anyway, just remember that you can slip a roofie or drugs into a non-alcoholic drink too.  Make sure if he gives you anything to drink, you watch him the entire time he’s making the drink.  Don’t fall for, ‘I’m going to the kitchen to get a drink, do you want one?’  Go with him and watch him make it.”

                The guy gave a horrifying look and the teenager seemed to notice.  If he had more of a poker face, he may have gotten her to come but now the girl was glaring back at Theo.  She uttered, “umm, maybe we should meet during business hours at your office or something.  Or, like, if you have a party at your house and there’s more people there, I’ll come over and talk business.  I think you’re right, the optics are bad and this guy kind of made it weird.”

                Theo rolled his eyes but when the girl rolled them as well when he finished, he paused.  He realized that she was using him as the bad guy because she realized he may have been right.  The guy she was with nodded, “Good idea, I have your number.  I’ll call you to see what time you should come by the office.”

                The guy got off at the next stop and the teenager moved over by Theo, “Thank you.”

                “You’re welcome.”

                “You’re single.”

                Theo was a little put off that it was a statement and not a question, “Yes, but how did you know?”

                “No wedding ring on your hand.”

                “That just means I’m not married.”

                “I took a guess.”

                “Well, you were right.”

                “Do you want to fuck me?”

                “No, you’re a child.”

                “Why did you rescue me then?”

                “If I saw you on the news tomorrow, I’d feel guilty that I could have tried to stop him but didn’t because of stupid embarrassment.”

                “The odds that I would have made the news are pretty low.”

                “Yea, maybe I would have felt guilty regardless of any confirmation that he raped you.  Maybe just the idea that he might have and I did nothing would have bothered me.”

                “Maybe?”

                “Yea, maybe.”

                “I think it’s hot that you protected me when you don’t know me.”

                “Let’s see if you think it is in three years.”

                “What do you do?”

                “I work at the White House.”

                “Wow, do you think you could get me an internship there?”

                “Nope”

                “Why not?”

                “I’m not responsible for hiring interns and I’m not going to vouch for someone I just met on the train.”

                “Well, I have an entire semester left at school.  The internship wouldn’t start till the summer.  That’s enough time to get to know me.”

                “Yes, but I live alone so it’s not appropriate.”

                Her lips spread wide apart, “Oh come on, nobody would know.”

                “I would know.”

                “So, you know you’re not going to do anything.  You’re not like that.”

                “You’re right, I’m not, which is why I’m not going to have you at my house alone.”

                “Don’t be so fucking old fashioned.”

                “I’m old, I can’t help it.”

                “We’d just be talking business.  It’ll be strictly professional.”

                “No”

                She gave a wry smile and rather than have a pleading complaining tone, took on a serious tone, “So, that’s how the conversation goes when you’re talking to someone who’s not a predator?”

                “Something like that.”

                “If I was 18 would you have fucked me?”

                “Probably not.”

                “Why not?” she posed self-consciously

                “It’s a little weird to me to have a woman fuck you because you saved her from being raped.  It’s like she still had to do the act anyway.”

                “It’s a huge difference when it’s consensual and when it’s not.”

                “That’s true but women have sex with guys because they feel like they owe it to them.  Maybe they bought one too many dinners or did too many nice deeds.  In this case, all I did to you was own you in a political debate and potentially saved you from being a victim or ‘survivor’ whatever you kids call it now.  Why would you owe me sex for saving you?”

                 “Stop looking at sex as a transaction.  Why can’t I fuck you because I want to?”

                “I don’t see why you would want to.  It seems the only reason you would is because I saved you.”

                “Girls like fucking guys smarter than them.  You owning me in the debate is a turn on.  Why can’t I just want to because of that?”

                “I don’t believe that.”

                “I’ll admit rescuing me did play a part but I don’t see a problem with that.  I’m just entertaining your premise that there is something wrong with that.”

                “Kind of like I’m entertaining the premise that having sex with you is in the realm of possibility today when I was quite clear that it will never happen because you’re 15.  The only way it would is three years down the road and who’s to say we know each other then?  I have no interest in marinating your ass for that long by getting you a summer internship.  Three years is a very long time.  Besides, you’re a grinder; you gave yourself two job interviews on a train ride home.  If you keep grinding like that, and you keep being as eager as you are to learn, then you’re going to make it,”

                “Thank you”

                “You’re welcome.”

                The train stopped at Theo’s stop and he got up.  The teenager got up and extended her arms.  Theo smiles and embraced her.  She squeezed tight and Theo followed suit.  “Thanks again.”

                “Don’t mention it, just be careful.”

                “I will”

                Theo walked out of the train and went home.  Part of him kicked himself for having morals as she had very nice curves but Theo never sacrificed his morals.  That, and he was being serious, stopping her from going home with someone his age only to take the same girl to his place seemed wrong.  He got ready for bed and lied down failing asleep easily, which was the main motivation for what transpired on the train. 

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