Theo the Trump employee Episode 31 Putting students in their place

                Theo passes through security at the White House.  Most people get butterflies as they walk into the house of the most powerful man in the world.  At least, he’s supposed to be but lately the Democrats have been trying to convince the American public that the president has no power.  The enormity of the office still isn’t lost on Theo but after working there for three years, the awe that comes to most people that go into the White House has dissipated some.  While working, one of his co-workers comes in, “Man, you got to see this?”

                “What?”

                “Adam Schiff talking about the whistleblower.”

                “I’m kind of getting sick of that story.”

                “No, this is so good.  Why else would I be here?”

                “Fine, you can show me” Theo replies frustratingly. 

                He is handed a tablet and he hits the play button.  What he sees is Adam Schiff interrupting his interviewer and says a statement off handedly that is so devastating that his attempt to downplay it with his tone has failed miserably.  Theo’s eyes widened as he stares at the screen, “What?!”

                His co-worker gives a wry smile, “I told you.”

                Theo plays it again and Adam Schiff indeed declared, ‘The Whistleblower isn’t necessary for impeachment.’  Theo responds, “The entire reason you talked about impeachment is because of the whistleblower.”

                “It gets better, keep listening”

                Theo does and Schiff goes on to say, “First of all, we don’t need a quid pro quo.  This isn’t about the call per say but the buildup to the call.  Why the call happened.  All the background information before the call.”
                Theo exclaims, “Is this guy serious?  He spent a week spouting off how bad the call was now he says the call doesn’t matter?  He was whining about a quid pro quo and now he doesn’t need it anymore.  I mean, this isn’t months or even weeks old, how do people fall for this bullshit?”

                “If there were no stupid gullible people, there would be no Democrats”

                “I get that but he constantly contradicts his story.   He does it on every issue.”

                “Our boss is just too smart for him.”

                “That’s not even saying much.  You got to admire his obsession with trying and failing I guess.”

                “Yea, hey what are you doing after work?”

                “I normally go to a college bar and troll college kids.”

                “Can I come?”

                “No, you ruined it already” Theo responded with a wide smile and sarcasm heavy in his voice.

                “How’s that?” the co-worker responded with the same smile

                “I usually go to decompress from being in the trenches in this war against the Democrats but you put me in a good mood. There’s nothing to decompress from.”

                “Well, we’ll see how the end of the day goes.  It could always get worse”

                “God, I hope so”

                They both laughed and Theo gave back the phone and the co-worker left the room.  Theo shook his head and went back to work.  After work, Theo and his co-worker go to a bar near American University.  At 35, Theo is definitely too old to be in a college bar but he doesn’t care.  His co-worker is slightly younger but is excited.  The co-worker asks, “You’re not going to get us killed are you?”

                “Who knows?  Never tried it with someone else.  I mean when I’m by myself, people think you’re just crazy but when you got backup then all of a sudden you’re sane.  Who knows how people will react when you’re sane.”

                “That is very comforting.” He opined with a lot of sarcasm

                They arrive at the bar and order a drink making small talk with each other.  As they are talking, Theo is listening to people to see if anyone is discussing politics.  Finally, a girl yells out to her friend, “It’s not a transcript, it’s a summary!”

                Theo smiles and turns toward the girl, “What makes you think that it was a summary?”

                “I saw on the news that the call was thirty minutes long but reading the transcript took less than twenty minutes or something.”

                “Who was the call between?”

                “Trump and the Ukrainian President.”

                “What language do they speak in Ukraine?”

                “Russian”

                “Depends where in Ukraine; west of Kiev, it’s Ukrainian but Kiev and east it’s Russian. Either way, we can agree that Ukraine is not an English speaking country?”

                “Well, yea but everyone speaks English”

                “But don’t you think that if heads of states are talking, you need to be sure that there isn’t a misunderstanding?”

                “I don’t know where you’re going with this.”

                “Well, people understand things better in their first language right?”

                “Yea”

                “So, what do you think was going on when they were talking?”  The girl looked confused so Theo continued, “They had translators.”

                “Oh, well yea, obviously”

                “Well, don’t you think that since it had to be translated, the call would be longer than the transcript?  Furthermore, wouldn’t the transcript have only the English and not the Ukrainian or Russian?”

                “Don’t man-splain, I’m an educated woman.”

                “Well, educated woman, explain to me the difference between ‘man-splain’ and ‘explain’”

                “You wouldn’t be that condescending with a man”

                “You don’t even know me so how can you make that assessment?”

                “Whatever, the news said it wasn’t a transcript”

                “But the whistleblower said it was a word for word transcript.  Who are you going to believe?”

                “I didn’t hear that.”

                “Yea, kind of destroys your argument doesn’t it?”

                “We’ll find out if the Whistleblower testifies.”

                “I hope he does because then he’ll have to admit that quid pro quo wasn’t said because it’s not in the transcript, which he admitted was verbatim.  Therefore his source lied to him.”

                “I’m sure he’ll be able to explain himself.”

                “I agree, which is why it’ll probably help the Republicans more.  What if he admits that Schiff told him what to write?  Or that Bill Taylor told him what to write?”

                “Yea, well, you look old.”

                “I am old”

                “Yea, so you’re in the wrong place”

                “There’s a maximum age for a bar now?”

                “You’re just a dirty old man” the girl snapped before she stormed off. 

                The co-worker looked at him incredulously, “That was hilarious.”

                “I know, it’s so much fun.”

                “Can I do the next one?”

                “Yea, sure”

                “What do you do?”

                “Wait for someone to make a political comment.  It helps if you know the topic extremely well because you’re dealing with brainwashed people.”

                “Yea that will insult you when they realize their losing.”

                “Precisely, that’s the best part.”

                This time Theo and his co-worker remained quiet drinking.  A boy announced that he was an expert on Ukraine.  Theo rolled his eyes and saw an expectant man who couldn’t wait to engage.  Theo snapped, “I never get someone to make such an arrogant statement like that.  You’re first time is putting that pompous wind bag in his place.  This is bullshit.”

                The co-worker, yelled out, “Hey buddy, let’s talk Ukraine.”

                The boy came over and the co-worker posed, “Where do you want to begin?”

                “Well, you need to understand that Ukrainian politics has Ukraine-friendly people vs. Russian friendly people.  That’s why their elections are much more chaotic than ours.”

                “Yes Yes, I know. Let’s do it as it relates to us.  Do you know who Telizhenko is?”

                The boy looked confused, “Yea, but he’s not very important.  It’s all about Porchenko.”

                “Not necessarily, Telizhenko called a meeting in January 2016.  That’s what led to the Manafort investigation.”

                “You mean the black ledger stuff?”

                “Yes, but it all started with Telizhenko”

                “Okay”

                “So, who was the president in January 2016?”

                “Obama”

                “Right, so him, the NSA and DOJ all wanted information on the parties of Regents….”

                “Those are the pro-Russian assholes”

                “Right, except both sides are assholes.  Anyway, Obama’s DOJ and Obama himself offered money for information about the party of regents”

                “So what?”

                “Isn’t this whole impeachment thing about President Trump allegedly threatening to withhold military aid if they don’t give him information about Biden?  The whole ‘quid pro quo’ how is that any different from what I just told you about Obama?”

                “Because Obama was looking for information about Ukrainian politics not American.”

                “They got the information about Paul Manafort, who was Trump’s campaign manager.”

                “Yea, but that was an accident.”

                “Kind of like when the prosecutor general of Ukraine looked into Burisma, a Ukrainian company, and found all these transfers to Hunter Biden, an American, who happens to be the son of the Vice President who is the point man for Ukraine for the White House?”

                “No, because the prosecutor general was corrupt.”

                “Everyone in Ukrainian politics is corrupt.  Why should we care?”

                “No, it’s not the same thing”

                “Fine, agree to disagree.  Speaking of Burisma; that was the other topic at the January 2016 meeting I told you about.”

                “Okay”

                “Do you find it a little odd that three days after this meeting, Telizhenko went to the White House?”

                “Not if he had information on Manafort.”

                “Funny, you have no problem when it’s the Democrats.  It would be nice if the Whistleblower testified because given the timing of this meeting, he may have some information on the origin of the Russian collusion hoax.”

                “That wasn’t open till the end of June.  You said February.”

                “Some believe that the DOJ is lying about when it was open.  It may have been much earlier.”

                “Do you have anything to back this up?”

                “Of course.  Both the Russian collusion hoax and the whistleblower scandal originated in the NSA and centered around the Burisma investigation being dropped.”

                “The NSA is supposed to find out this shit.  They deal with national security.”

                “And a Ukrainian energy company who has shady money transfers is a matter of national security?  Wouldn’t the CIA be in to that first?”

                “I’m not really sure whose jurisdiction that would be in.”

                “For the first time, you don’t seem to be the expert you proclaimed to be.”

                “I meant the current issue not the back story.”

                “Alright, so let’s go current.  Who do you think the whistleblower is?”

                “Well, nobody knows that.”

                “Any guesses?  I mean given that you’re an expert and all you should have some suspicions.”

                “I haven’t thought about it.  I respect his privacy.”

                “Well, I don’t because we know he lied about what was in the call because we have the transcript.”

                “He was just misinformed.”

                “He shouldn’t have been saying anything if he wasn’t on the call.”

                “The people on the call were too scared.”

                “I doubt that since everyone on mainstream media will praise you if you attack President Trump.”

                “Who do you think it is?”

                “What do we know about the Whistleblower?”

                “He worked for Joe Biden and he was a former NSA member.”

                “More specifically, the National Security Council but yes.  Why not look for the guy at the NSA in charge of European and Russian affairs?”

                “Sounds like a good place to start.”

                “Who was that?”

                “I don’t know”

                “Eric Ciaramella”

                “Alright, so maybe he’s the whistleblower so what?  He’s still a hero.”

                “For lying?”

                “No”

                “Then for what?”

                “Standing up to Trump.”

                “By lying?”

                “No, I told you he was misinformed”

                “By spouting shit he didn’t know anything about because he was playing telephone and now we’ve had to go through weeks of impeachment inquiries because he reported bad information.  He apparently didn’t vet it too well.”

                “I don’t know man!”

                “You know what’s also interesting about Ciaramella?”

                “More interesting than his being the whistleblower?”

                “Yes”

                “What?”

                “He was at that 1/19/16 White House meeting.”

                “Well, then it can’t be him?”

                “Why?”

                “They can’t be connected.”

                “Why not?”

                “Well….because….then…it’s like they planned this years ago.”

                “Yea, I think that’s what happened too.”

                “What else did this Italian guy do?”

                “His name sounds Italian but he’s actually Ukrainian.”

                “Fine, is that all you got?”

                “No, he e-mailed John Kelly complaining that Russians helped fire Comey.”

                “But, that’s what prompted the Mueller special council”

                “Oh, you noticed that too.”

                “Who’s John Kelly?”

                “Former White House Chief of Staff for President Trump.  He resigned on January 2, 2019.  Before that, he was the secretary of homeland security.”

                “It seems like this guy just tries very hard to take down President Trump.”

                “You admit that the Mueller report was an epic waste of time?”

                “Well, when he testified, it was just pathetic.  If you’re right then the same guy complaining about the last big scandal is behind this one.  Why do people still listen to him?”

                “That is a good question.  I don’t have that answer except people are so desperate to get president Trump they don’t bother verifying information.  They want to win in the court of public opinion so there’s public support for impeachment.  They know they can’t win in a formal trial or inquiry so they do it to people that are only mildly paying attention.  Then these same people shout in crowded bars that they’re experts.”

                “You made that point abundantly clear.” The boy seethed back between clenched teeth clearly upset.

                “Do you have any more questions?”

                “No, I’m good.”

                “Alright, let me buy you a drink”

                “Thank You”

                The co-worker buys the boy a drink and turns to Theo, “That was awesome.”

                “Yea, that’s why I do it after work.”

                “I need to get home though.”

                “I figured. I’ll leave too.”

                Theo and his co-worker close their tab and leave the bar.  They take different trains and split up after saying their good bye.  Theo hears a high pitched voice behind him, “Umm, can we talk?”

                Theo turns around and sees the same girl he was debating before in the bar, “Sure”

                “I’m Paula by the way?”

                “I’m Theo” he replied as he extended his hand. 

                Paula was around 5’7” and thin with average breasts and a small butt and dark skin.  She articulated, “I’m sorry for insulting you earlier.  It’s just that you made me feel stupid and I was with my friends.”

                “Don’t worry about it, I got thick skin.”

                “Yea, anyway, can we go somewhere to talk more about politics?”

                “If you can handle it.  Tell you the truth; I get nervous when woman accuse men of being chauvinists because they debate with them and disagree.”

                “I know but I said sorry.”

                “And I accepted that but I still think you’re prone to do it again.”

                “Well, I don’t want to argue.  There’s a lot of bullshit out there and you actually seem to make sense.”

                “Well thank you but what’s in it for me?”

                “Talking to a pretty young girl.  Educating a college student.  Being social.  Being a nice person.  Take your pick.”

                Theo smiled, “I guess I could do that.”

                Paula and Theo go to a bar and sit across from each other.  Paula started, “I saw on TV a congressman, I think, Collins…”

                “From Georgia.  He’s a Republican”

                “Right, so he was talking about this Inspector general report.”

                “Well, it’s supposed to be pretty damning.”

                “See, that’s my point.  What can I expect?”

                “Well, apparently it’s really really long but that’s not odd.  The Mueller report was over 430 pages and it said nothing.  I guess, you have to see how the people that have been cued in on what’s in it are reacting.”

                “Do you know that?”

                “Well, Comey is the most pissed so he’s probably not seen too highly of in the report.”

                “Anything specific?”

                “Steele didn’t swear to the dossier’s authenticity but Comey and McCabe did.  It could talk about Brennan briefing Harry Reid and the gang of eight on Capitol Hill about things only found in the dossier.”

                “That would mean he saw the dossier before December 2016.  So he lied.”

                “No, he might just know Steele.  Steele told him what was in the dossier but he didn’t see the actual document till December.  It’s a play on words.”

                “Well, that’s still shady.”

                “Yes, but he’s CIA.  He’s kind of paid to be sketchy and slick”

                “I guess”

                “Also, the report may reveal that in January 2017, Surkov, a Russian that Steele named a source, was deemed not credible by Comey when he met him at a DOJ meeting.  If Comey deemed him not credible, why would he trust the document that Surkov was a source for and stamp it verified as true?”

                “You’re really smart”

                “No, I just follow politics but I look beyond what you see on mainstream media.”

                Paula leaned in and coyly smiled at Theo locking eyes.  Theo leaned in and kissed her. Paula inquired, “Do you have a girlfriend?”

                “Nope, but I do have to go home.  You’re a little young for me.”

                “What?! I’m old enough to drink.  I’m an adult.”

                “The fact that you equate those two things is why I’m leaving.”

                “Whatever, Trump will never be more popular than Obama.  Most people think this impeachment is damning”

                “Actually, his poll numbers have gone up since this impeachment whistleblower scandal came out.  His approval numbers are higher than Obama’s was at this time.  By every sense of the word, this whistleblower hoax is a failure.”

                The girl said nothing.  Theo left the bar and got on the subway.  He didn’t know why he was so turned off but he really didn’t trust girls that played the chauvinist card.  His train arrived and he got on it heading toward Rockville, Maryland.  On the train, a black man was listening to his phone without headphones.  Theo realized that only black people seemed to do this.  He wondered what would happen if a White person would try it.  He thought white people didn’t because they were too afraid of other’s reactions but black people exploited that people are so afraid of them using the race card that they don’t get involved.  They could, however, just not want to confront a stranger.  It may not matter at all because people are wary of strangers because you never know how crazy someone was.  Nobody wants to get into a physical confrontation over turning down a cell phone.  Theo recognized the voice on the phone.  It was Sam Donaldson, who was a retired White House correspondent.  The quote was that all Trump supporters are White Christians.”

                Theo instinctively rolled his eyes and scoffed.  The black man noticed and rejoined, “What? You got something to say?”

                “Yea, it’s ANTIFA that attacks minorities at Trump rallies not the actual attendees.  Donaldson should have just stayed retired.”

                “That’s easy coming from a rich dude like you.”

                “You think I’m rich because I’m white?  Wouldn’t I be able to afford a car and parking if I was rich?”

                “No, rich people take the train too.”

                “Oh alright but so do poor right?”

                “Yea but the poor pay more in taxes”

                “that’s ridiculous”

                “I heard it on TV”

                “Yea, well that’s your problem.  According to the congressional budget office, the top 1% pays a third of all the taxes.”

                “These dudes Gatz & Zusman said it.”

                “Yea, they had the number at 30%, so they underestimated it.”

                “Close enough”

                “No, it’s not.  Fine, they don’t only want to include income tax.  They want to include all the state and federal taxes we pay.  If you’re going to do that, though, why not include the Earned Income Tax Credit or tax refund?”

                “I’m sure they did.”

                “No, they didn’t.  The study overinflated what poor people pay and underestimated how much rich pay.  Then, all of a sudden, the poor people actually pay a negative tax burden because they get more money back than they put in.”

                “So, they lied twice.”

                “At least”

                “Well that sucks.”

                “Yea”

                “I’m Deshawn by the way.”

                “Theo”

                Deshawn didn’t play any other videos.  When the train got to Rockville, Theo got off.  He hoped he wouldn’t normally have company when he travelled to the bars.  Although it was fun to watch someone else troll them, it was more fun being a spectator because you didn’t have to think of a response, you just sat back and enjoyed the show.  Still though, he didn’t want to make a habit of it.  He walked through his house and then watched some TV before ending his day.